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MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY??? 2011

2010-12-24T17:29:00.002+08:00

Christmas is arriving... snowstorm is wrecking havoc in Europe... Wikileaks is the in news... Republicans are controlling the House... MRT is coming... The year 2010 is coming to an end and we are in the midst of welcoming 2011.

My observation as so far of my age of 41, human beings are generally selfish. The writer is included. We live for our own benefit. The fortunates will always want the status quo and in so doing, will always want to keep the unfortunates be where they are. The fortunates would not want contamination from a cross over.

We are seeing that Malaysia is trying to lure our own homegrown talents back from overseas to further expand and move our country into a progressive future. How about the ones that are in the country now? What efforts are there to keep the talents in here from leaving before the creation of luring the outsides back in? Malaysia in general, do not recognize the vast talents that we have instead we are known to have a lot of nonsensical people put into positions that they are not at all qualified to be at.

Our money is flowing to people that do not have the responsibilities to the investors and to add salt to the wound, this money given out are grants!!! It means the irresponsibles do not have to pay back to the government!!! What they do with the money.... buy new expensive cars, overpay to their cronies, etc... I am saddened by these turn of events as these grants could have been given to people who are far more deserving and people that could use this money to really push the technology or products to the global stage... instead using it to their selfish deeds...

And we wonder why the talents do not want to come back...

Let us reflect back why our Malaysia could have been more to the world then where she is now. Why are our neighbours fare much better than us?

My hope is dashed as I thought I saw changes around the world could have an impact for the better but it is the same old, same old. Hard habits to break. Our world economy is still looming towards a collapse... Governments of the world are still not reacting fast enough to the changes... Wars are still imminent...

Sigh...

Merry Christmas and a Happy 2011... ;)

Los Angeles after 14 years

2010-11-05T21:03:00.005+08:00

The night we arrived in Los Angeles was raining. How fortunate or the alternative, whichever way you want to see it. 14 years, a long time for me to revisit the city which was once a home to me for 7 years. What is my feeling? How do I feel about Los Angeles?

All the feelings came gushing through me. Love? Hate? Indifference? All wrapped up in one.

I became the designated guide here. We took the rented cars and...lo and behold... I missed a turn into the 405 Freeway and ended up, we had to use La Cienega Blvd all the way to our hotel.

We had a few assignments that we had to cover like interviewing a Buddhist nun, traced Rinpoche's path when he used to walk from Western to Hollywood Mann Chinese Theatre, cover Santa Monica Pier and Griffith Observatory and the Hollywood sign.

I was fortunate to meet my old friends, Tim, Michael and Luther....

Here I realized why I decided to go home to Malaysia that 14 years ago. Most of my friends are still single. I sensed the loneliness.

The loneliness that I felt... The superficiality of Hollywood...

I am a LUCKY BASTARD for if not for the path that I decided to choose, I would not be where I am today. That does not mean that I am well to do yet but I am contented. Never regret the choice that I made. ;)

MY JOURNEY THUS FAR

2010-10-12T14:39:00.002+08:00

Are we following a particular script with the lives that we live? Is it predestined the steps and choices that we make? I am baffled so far with how my journey has come so far. There is a sense of wonderment that goes with it. The where, when, who and how come into play.

My wife has always say to me, “You LUCKY bastard.”, in a joking tone. She is right. I am very lucky in the circumstance that I am at. Let us look at the scenario, I am writing this at an altitude of about 30,000 feet in a plane, heading towards New York, on a computer that my father has recently gotten for me. That sentence itself has shown how lucky I am. Another scenario, recently I was privileged to have met with RINPOCHE with whom this trip to the United States would not have happened if it was not for the privileged meeting. We can always question about coincidences but there come a time where we surrender to incidences and let them just work their way through you.

The end result justifies everything that you go through. We have only recently been engaged to be involved in this project that is taking me to New York. I had my US visa interview just merely two days before my scheduled flight. The interview, in my mind, was tough. I was bombarded with questions that tested my patience and how truthful I can in answering them and yet I am treated as if I lied on the answers. Surprised I was with myself as the interview was being conducted, I could see and feel myself outside looking into myself being interrogated. In my mind, I persisted on that I have to be as truthful as possible. There was a moment where I thought that I might not get the visa at all as the interviewer kept pressing on that I am hiding an agenda but the unexplainable sometimes intervene and you just ride with it.

It has been 14 years since I have been to the United States. How am I feeling? I have returned to my second home which will be Los Angeles and I’ll be there closer to the end of the trip. Elated I am with the trip. Let’s see what is in store. New York, Big Apple.... Here I come..... ;)

A YEAR OF CHANGE

2010-04-10T21:22:00.008+08:00

Well… It has been quite a while the last time I wrote. Preoccupied I am to try to jumpstart our company when all came to a halt after our sponsor pulled out from WORLDSTARS and how much the project meant to me and devastated I was completely.

After that fiasco, PATJENN FILM came back with a blast with a slew of little projects that kept us going and busy. I am grateful to Dom for giving me the opportunity to coach acting again and then the chance to produce and direct two music videos for Soo Wincci.

Then came Miss Malaysia Universe 2009 and MIFA 2009 which was indeed a blessing in disguise and we got to be able to work with Syeba again.

2009 ended with a nice project with Manulife where we put our heart and soul into creating a nice corporate video, a vision & mission video and Jenn composed an unforgettable tune for their theme song. All in all, 2009 was not too bad.

With 2010, I wanted a big change so Jenn and I can concentrate in making and expanding our little company, PATJENN FILM into a more striving business. We changed our business card with a completely new look and logo and we also softly launched our website.

The biggest change is I decided with Jenn to move out of our little comfort zone of Puchong to a more nicer place on the other side of town and our kids are now in a new school, and I am glad that they are adjusting to the change which Jenn and I hope that it will greatly improve our FENG SHUI.

Thank you 2009 and HELLO 2010… ;D

Great Grate

2009-08-08T20:36:00.001+08:00

I am cynical. The gray area is where I reside to keep myself observant to my surroundings, hoping that I would be more capable to absorb bad falls. I am human. Only a human. OUCH!! Yep. A human. Pinched myself hard to stupidly prove that I am but only of flesh and blood. I make mistakes in judgments and hopefully I will never again fall into the same shit holes again.

I also believe in darkness, there will always be light and that is where I am heading, the light. As I was dwindling downwards over my failed project, I had the opportunity to redeem myself by recently directing two music videos. In dwelling darkness, I appreciate to be in the shower of light as it breathes a sense of living back to me. To exist, is to be able to negotiate through the light and dark and how I wish but as I am only a human, to be able to reside permanently in the gray.

It was a decision that I made. Always the rights and wrongs that one make that determine the direction that one is heading towards either the light or dark, rarely gray because decision is an action and gray is inaction. A cause will always have its effect. Ying will always have its Yang. The nature of this existence.

Decided I did to go to a fashion show a few months ago at One Utama with my wife that had this domino effect to what I have accomplished today. A chance meeting with Dominique and his talents on that night and how he decided to trust me to hold acting lessons to his talents and later, the trickled down effect to the directing of the two music videos, and again it was all due to the trust Dominique put on me. For that, Dominique, I thank you. Grateful I am with the trust that you have given to PATJENN FILM.

Trust? Easy word, right? How can trust be measured or quantified?
It’s not that easy anymore, right?

to be continued...

MY DEEPEST GRATITUTE AND APOLOGIES

2009-05-17T21:50:00.001+08:00

The dark side of our ego that is in us manifests in ways that one needs “mirror” to reflect back the ugliness that one has done. The “mirror” is someone that has a clear mind in seeing what you have done and tells it as it is.

I am first of all only but flesh and blood and that, I am only a human. Flaws stack over flaws. Stubborn runs deep in my blood. Upon that, I confess that with my ego I took up a project in which I thought could assist in propelling my company to a more prominent position. Greed was not the factor but my confidence is that I could deliver a very good programme that will showcase what PATJENN FILM can offer which is to tell good stories.

The project was a BAD APPLE from the get go. From this vantage point now, I am able to evaluate clearly the worms that are rotting the apple. The biggest problem was there was no centralized control over the project. The event is handled by one other company, the TV project is handled by us, and the all consuming supposedly people’s agency that wants to have all the glory for virtually nothing. How does one get sponsors in when all is not centralized?

A sponsor we did finally get but we got SCREWED big time when just on the eve of our LIVE show for TV, the irresponsible sponsor pulled out, leaving us in a HUGE DEBT to the people that have put their trust and hard work in the project.

First and foremost, my wife, Jenn has always been the LIGHTHOUSE and the PILLAR of my life. Due to my stubbornness, I relied on my instinct (most times, it’s off the marks) to trudge through this troubled project by acting on our strength which is honesty and integrity. I am wrong. I am wrong. Jenn had warned me early on but I persisted on. My deepest apology and gratitude to Jenn.
To all the others, Asaph Sia, Martyn, Ronnie, Liang, Sean, Jehan, Vanessa and all the others that we owe this HUGE DEBT, let me own up my mistakes and my deepest apologies to all of you. My deepest gratitude for the understanding and my promise is that we will settle the debt. Time is what I am asking for. Thank you. Thank you.

J. THE FOOL

2009-01-09T00:11:00.006+08:00

There is a point where I draw the line. I have met many Singaporeans in my lifetime, this is the first when I have really met a Singaporean that epitomizes the KIASU-ISM culture that Singapore is famous for and the name is awarded to the great J. who I believed is the greatest idiot on the face of the earth. He is supposed to be the most successful filmmaker in Singapore. I need to spit. I don't understand a person who thinks that he is the best which I can dispute at all cost. He maybe hardworking and responsible but we can also argue that ADOLF HITLER was a person who has love in him but he is a monster.

He thinks that he is creative..... Hmmm..probably for an average Singaporean he is. I'm writing a report on my professional working relationship in this project that I was commissioned to do. He demanded what, I have met. If he is unhappy, he should have also helm the project in which the actual project was supposed to be helmed by another person but being the idiot that J. is and also because J. has to satisfy his own self deprecating EGO, he took over the project, leaving the other person in the drain.

The world is going through a great filtration at the moment, purging out the bad and in hopes, will let the good to blossom. It is HIGH TIME that he be purged out into the global sewerage system just like the likes of Bernard Madoff. ;D

DISEASE OF THE COMMONS

2008-12-31T11:52:00.001+08:00

We, homo-sapiens have co-existed, endured and tolerated with a great many diseases throughout history and modern science has greatly assisted us to eradicate or suppress a great many diseases. Now, now, there is one disease elusive to science and naturally infused in the DNA of us that it will probably take another millennia for it to be evolved over.

You would ask… naturally what type of disease? The answer is there are still plenty of diseases out there that aren’t been discovered yet. This particular disease exists in all of us irrespective of race or religion. Have I perked your interest?

Hypocrisy is the disease. Disagree? Let’s look at it first before concluding an opinion.

Let us look at TRUTH. A glass is half filled with water. Is it half full or half empty? Both can be deemed as true. Then, truth can be half truth also. So, is there an ultimate truth?Ultimate truth would probably lies between the unbiased position of the half full and half empty. Most of us, homo-sapiens leave the ultimate truth to GOD and the organization of religions. Hypocrisy begins to fester once we leave it to an extension out of ourselves to decide our opinion of an ultimate truth. Are we so naïve that we do not trust to look inwards to ourselves to decide what’s right or wrong? Once we look outwards, things begin to complicate with a barrage of opinions that are based on a specific religious context and you become a follower to that context rather than your own context. Politics is another avenue that falls within the same context.

To be continued...

H O P E

2008-10-03T23:40:00.001+08:00

We are living in a time of uncertainties. Look around us and we will wake out of these “sleeping beauty” sleeps. Governments around the globe being toppled in this unstable time. Global weather playing games of destructions. Global economy is shaken with a 9.0 on the Richter scale. A book. Yes, a book that is about to be published that is causing a lot of HO-HUM. The mental status of people around the world is on the verge of imploding upon themselves.

Let us smile, smell and appreciate. ;> ;D ;)

We are in an entire new millennia where anything goes. All the bad and the evils will slowly wane away as good will slowly shine. In that process of filtration, there has to be chaos. In chaos, we have a realization that in my most optimistic cynical point here that we will have a better world to live. Hope is our utmost station in all of us to head and there is where we shall go. Hope.

BERLINALE-PERIENCE

2008-09-15T16:57:00.002+08:00

Late 2004, Jenn and I received the answer that we were accepted to Berlinale Talent Campus. Just weeks before, I had given up that we would be accepted at all. Jenn sent 5 pages of ECHOES as a screenwriter while I sent 1 minute of ECHOES as a director. The theme for the year was on PRODUCTION DESIGN.
It was a surreal feeling to actually be accepted at all and I appreciated every single moment while I was there.

We had to fly into Frankfurt first before we caught another to Berlin. We were there during the winter and cold it was but there was no sign of white snow yet. Our hostel was very close to the zoo and the place was central to a lot of other places. One was a church which partially was destroyed during WW2 and that gave me a perception to the history in close up. Below our hostel, there were BURGER KING, a horrible Chinese joint which we tried the first day and never again we set foot in there and a flower shop which had some of the most beautiful flowers I have ever seen.

The first day, we had to register in the huge centre which was built to house all the seminars, workshops and 500+ of us. Interesting experience was that we were able to meet filmmakers from all over the world and share our cultures through our films. I attended some really interesting seminars. One with Ridley Scott, then with Chris Doyle and the costume designer for HERO where both of them share their experiences making the movie, Walter Salles, Mike Figgis, etc…

I was glad to have had conversations with Walter, Mike, Bai Ling (in real life, she is quite an intelligent and thoughtful person) and Chris, who spoke fluently in Mandarin and he always had a mug of beer with him at all times, even during his talk. A funny and friendly person he is.

Snow came during the second day and I was so happy as it was here in Berlin that my wife, Jennifer finally got her first experience of seeing and feeling snowflakes. We found this very nice Chinese restaurant and a great gelato place and we frequented the places after the second day for the next few days. Gained weight I did!!

Red carpet premiere experience where we walked on the red carpet into the cinema with FLASHES going off here and there. Once in the cinema, we waited for the arrival of Will Smith, Eva Mendes, Kevin…, the other girl and the director, Andy Tennant for HITCH. Arrived they did and we got a firsthand experience of movie premiere in Berlin.

I will definitely be going back to Berlin one of these days hopefully to have my film premiered there. Hope is a good thing. ;D

A MOMENT OF PARANG, “AMBIK” & DEATH

2008-09-09T22:03:00.003+08:00

2AM. Finally, we arrived at my home, 84H Jalan Pergam, Sungai Petani… my hometown. Jenn did the driving from Bukit Merah to the destination. Quaint… shades of dim lights coming off the lamp posts and a few fluorescent lights that glows from the shophouses. Jenn helped to take a few bags from the trunk, and being exhausted from the trip she went upstairs together with my father who opened the door for us. We left KL about 8pm and raining heavy it was. Both of us decided to stop in Ipoh for IPOH TAUGE CHICKEN HOR FUN and we did. We thoroughly enjoyed the meal under the drizzle.

So, Jenn has just left to go upstairs. I collected a few more stuff from the trunk and closes. A HAND grabs my neck and a PARANG was wielded near my neck. Slightly rusted and stained but it still had a shine to it. Another guy, Indian emerges from my back and stabs in the air a small knife toward me. Everything happened so FAST but that moment I felt time completely BRAKED and it was going at an extremely irritatingly snail pace. A parang next to my neck… a knife going at the air… the mysterious guy behind me gruffly telling me in Bahasa Melayu not to make any SUDDEN STUPID MOVE. Now, with these two sharp steels in front of me… DEATH flashes in my head. “This is it!!” This being the second time I got MUGGED!! Funny as it is, 2 years ago I was mugged 7am in the morning while I was heading to work on my C70. That experience had knives also. Lightning struck twice at me!!

My decision at that moment was… PLEASE TAKE WHATEVER YOU WANT!!!
AMBIK!! Har!!! Har!!! And take they did and for the second round, my wallet left my pocket and DARN!!! I.C., cards, driver’s license…ADIEU… Miss them I do. Well, at least I’m alive to write this.

TIME TO BE BACK

2008-09-02T23:52:00.003+08:00

It has been quite a while. Anthony Minghella’s death has been a reminder to me about mortality. You have one life to try to achieve as much great moments as possible and once the expiry date arrives, one has to resign everything and hopefully transcend to another plane. Would everybody regret the moment he or she dies? Ah, the question!

During the economic downturn in 1997, I followed my friend, Ronnie Chan to try and set up a company that ventures into production with another friend of mine, Brando Lee. Since it was the downturn, you would have guessed the outcome for a new company coming up during the threshold of economic collapse. The company still survives today but the casualty at the time was me. Ronnie is a great mentor. During the time, I learnt more in life with him and that I would never forget. One of the things that he said was to never regret. Always live in the present. Easier said than done. We are creatures of despair. We like to torture ourselves because we will always linger in the past and see the illusion of future that never will. Our mind will always drift and it is up to us to focus on the moment at all times.

Do I regret?

Yes. Yes. I do try to live by what Ronnie has given to me. The things that you do everyday, be it something that you can control(ILLUSION!) or not, I try to be in the moment. The key word is TRY. Yes, I’m still trying but heck, I hope I will be more regular with my writing now than my constipations.

I will update later with what I’ve done so far. I’ve been to Hong Kong and Singapore in the past 3 weeks. I’m also working on a script for a telemovie.

A Gray Day That Reflects Back My Emotional State

2008-03-19T15:12:00.012+08:00

It has been pouring tears the whole day since the morning. Rightly, it reflects my feelings for the day. I read the news last night and still trying to accept that I will no longer be able to see another masterpiece from a master filmmaker.

ANTHONY MINGHELLA DEAD AT 54

I have begun to read MINGHELLA ON MINGHELLA two years ago and recently, I read it again and what I find is a filmmaker who is intelligent, appreciative and generous in sharing his feelings and knowledge about his personal craft in writing and directing. His insights into his works are invaluable to all the new filmmakers out there. His appreciation with the people that he works with is genuine and heartfelt. My Talented Mr. Ripley DVD arrived last week and I devour through the film for the first time again since the last I saw it in the cinema years ago and I find the film as entertaining as the first time I saw it. A late bloomer I am in appreciating Minghella's films. I remember my first experience of The English Patient which I happened to catch it at the now defunct REX cinema in Kuala Lumpur when I first got back to Malaysia. I loved the film but it was one that simmered and slow boiled until about two years ago for me to really really appreciate the enormity of the theme and his ability as a master storyteller in weaving through time and space to tell a love story that will never be in an intimate sensitive way without resorting to overly melodramatize the relationships. I was in Vancouver in 2004 and I remembered how badly I wanted to catch Cold Mountain. I got to watch it in Downtown Vancouver and again, I remembered liking the film a lot but only recently, I appreciated the film more than before.Well, I have to face the fact that there will never be another film from him and therefore,

May you rest in peace, Anthony Minghella...

INSPIRING WRITING 2

2008-02-27T14:49:00.003+08:00

A blank white canvas seats in front of me. Not a single word that courses through me from the neurons of the mind, activating the electrical jolts surging through the nerves to my fingers to even tap a single alphabet to form a word or even a sentence. The mysteries of writing?

I let idea/s to percolate in my mind first. Days, weeks, maybe months the idea/s remains in that state. A state of limbo. A state of hibernation. It is important that the idea/s stay in the state until one of the ideas begin to slowly erupts out of that cocoon of percolation.

Now! Let it flow through you and let the fingers work and you begin to sculpt the white canvas with sculptures of words, sentences, verbs and prose. Cause and effect work in tandem, a conflicting of harmony. Inspiration is a drug. A natural one at that as it acts as an adrenaline rush that pushes your mind and your body to create something which had percolated in the ridges of the mind and finally erupting out into the physical world of ours in the form of language where we understand.

... To be continued

INSPIRING WRITING

2008-02-20T21:40:00.002+08:00

The process of writing is a lone journey that should be as organic and as dangerous as it can and should be. I am corrupted. Corrupted by the very film education system that I learned in Los Angeles. Corrupted by the 3 ACT structure that is being preached like it is a logical scientific formula. There are books and books written about how a screenplay should be written... plot point 1 should be at the tenth page or tenth minute into the movie... then it should be propelled the character and situation to the next level of obstacle...

Now... if all of these have been distilled down to a perfect formula for writing screenplays... In fact all the movies should be box office hits and the question that we need to ask... Why aren’t they all box office hits??!! Do we really need to read all those books?

Yes... and then take them like a pinch of salt... and then forget them completely. No matter how much you have prepared yourself with your loglines, synopsis', research, treatments or scene cards... once you begin to write, it will have a life of its own. Let it, don't succumb yourself to the system that you have already set. Its a TRAP!! Those preliminary preparations should be what it is... preliminary preparations. You should not let them be your hindrance as they can destroy the organic nature of writing if you follow them studiously.

When inspiration comes, it flows through the writing as fluidly as possible and nothing that can come in between you and the MICROSOFT WORD. Now the problem comes when inspiration stalls!!

What do we do when that happens?

... to be continued

A RATTY Coincidence

2008-01-28T19:30:00.011+08:00

1996 was a turning point of a year for me as I finally came back to my beloved "teh tarik culture", Malaysia and after 7 years of my life that was spent in Los Angeles. I remembered joining this production house as my first job as an in house director. My first project was a Chinese New Year project called Balik Kampung'97. That year was the year of the RAT... and 12 years later, the lady boss called me to helm a Chinese New Year project and this time, it is called A Heavenly Chinese New Year as the hosts mainly are located on top of KL Tower and also on top of Eye On Malaysia. My recollection of making Balik Kampung'97 was not a good one as my first experience with a local production house was mind and body shattering. It was disorganized and poor communication. I was thrown into this project once I joined the company and the management promised me that everything was under control. Hmmm.... I should have noticed the problem from the beginning... Well... I was young at the time and I wanted to make a difference as this FILM GRADUATE from Hollywood. Har!! Har!! Man... I was so naive... ;? Firstly, I was given this Production Manager who seems to be very nice in the beginning but later he will become a nightmare to the production. He disappeared from the production during the 2nd day of the shoot and when he did come back some days later, he created havoc in front of the talents and the crew. I had to pull him to one side and chased him out of the set. Secondly, the script was still being written when the shoot was a week away and when it did come... it was in Chinese!!! Yep!! I am a self confessed banana. I can't read Chinese except for my name and those ultra simple characters like, 'I', 'You'...errr I guess that's it. On the big day when we had close to 20 celebrities to shoot, I had a long night before that as we shot until 2am and that day began at 7am. That night I requested for 3 cameras as there were a lot of things to cover in this big bungalow where the CNY celebration was held. I was given the 3 cameras but I did not have monitors to look at and no walkie talkie to communicate with my cameramen. I ended up like a fool running around to all the cameramen, telling them what I wanted. We were still shooting after 10pm and I was at the verge of breaking down. I called upon Brando Lee to assist me in completing the shoot and we finally finished shooting at 2.30am. This time out, I was quite happy that everything ran quite proper with very minor hiccups as Jenn and I were essentially steering the whole production. The hiccups came from the production house and we are still affected by them but Jenn and I are pushing forward to do better and greater things ahead. The bitter taste is best forgotten.

The Year of Change

2008-01-05T21:53:00.000+08:00

The past few days I've been listening to the US presidential candidates going on and on about CHANGE.... and indeed last year was a year where my life has gone through a semi-drastic transformation.

Travelled I have to India last year, a journey that has changed the way I worked for the past few years. When I returned, everything slowly converged to a single point for me to head into a new direction, a direction where I have always dreamt but dare not make. Actually, I did make it a few years back in 2004 but I was not ready yet and that costs my family a few months of grief as I was unemployed.

Meeting Sidney at a mamak restaurant one afternoon in KL was the day that changed everything. How ironic and coincidental things can be, Sidney telling me that his girlfriend was co-directing a reality show and after Sidney left, I was about to get on my trusted Honda C70, I got a phone call from the production manager of the reality show that they are looking for a director. And that day I decided to take up the offer to co-direct THE FIRM.

A great experience it was and during the directing stint, Jennifer and I decided to start our company and do it seriously. We wanted to control the end product so in order for that, we decided to get our post-production house going first. It was easy to say that we wanted to start the company but the question was..... where are we going to get the money??? Jenn did a lot of the budget breakdown and we scouted around our relatives for potentially investing into our set up. It was difficult to convince them as we have no track record to support what we were venturing into... but I thought family is supposed to support whenever one needs the assistance but it was quite a difficult push as some of them were still contemplating whether to invest or not. Later, Jenn's auntie in the US decided to invest the biggest chunk in our little set up, together with my father putting in a smaller portion.

I am proud to say that our little set up is doing OK. Anything could be much better but I am not complaining because we are moving and we are planning for bigger projects and 2008 will be a year where we will prosper (have to use word as Chinese New Year is approaching...) ;>

Bourne Dust

2007-10-28T22:26:00.000+08:00

Finally, I have completed almost all the episodes of mifa8 Fashion Forward. At the moment, we are waiting for the KL International Fashion Week 2007 which will begin in 2 weeks time & where mifa8 will present their collections. So, I'm busy doing editing at the moment after a two week shoot. I'm way behind on a lot of things.

I owe John Badalu an English subtitles for CHOICE which I'm trying to do at the moment also, movies that I'm missing that I have to catch up on and tomorrow is another hectic day for me as I have to run QUITE a FEW errands but I'm loving it!!

I had the chance to watch STARDUST last week, thanks to Sia & Sok Kee for the free tickets. I've read about the movie but I didn't know that it would be that good. I enjoyed the humours in the film. Never had I laughed so hard over De Niro's performance over in front of the mirror... if you have seen TAXI DRIVER then you would get the joke. Michelle Pfeiffer was deliciously EVIL. The visual efx could have been better but soon you will forget about that and you are sucked into the characters and the story which I thought was an interesting take on fairy tales.

Recently, I caught Bourne. What a catch! A film that tightens your eyes to the gripping plot and the nearly non-stop action & thrilling sequences and only loosens them after the credit rolls. Matt Damon seems to be getting better and better but what I enjoyed most was seeing two veteran actors playing out, Joan Allen & David Strathairn.

Now, back to my work...

The Blurring of Emotions

2007-10-04T23:09:00.000+08:00

Love and Hatred... Happiness and Anger... Simple and easy to differentiate those emotions in words but how do one conducts with loved ones, friends, colleagues, clients and strangers is where others would be able to judge the person by.

Saddened I am today when I hear someone that is once close to me, treats me otherwise. A friend I consider the person to be once but in a working environment, things change. The person I considered a friend was promoted and happy I was for the person. Until... There is always one turning point in an enticing story, right? The person changed... errr... mutated! Power changes people... power corrupts... Yep! Another cliche... sad to say but it's true.

Yes, due to the problem with my feet, I had to leave my job and yet there is a certain quarter that seems to hold a grudge for my early resignation. Why?

For that, emotions have blurred the person as a professional. One should not mix personal grudges with the professional job at hand. In the end, the young kids become the casualties because of the corrupted way the person is handling the personal grudge. Should they be the casualties? At this point, I am angry. Angry at the person for being lost in the person's own personal grudge towards me, using the power granted to the person to banish me and in turn, the act only hurts the young kids!! Can't the person just pull out and look at the destruction that the person is creating!

Once I too held the power the person is having now, I never considered it as power as I treat everybody the same as I want myself to be treated, equal and not by the pyramidal hierarchy. This is how I work as a director also. The only thing that I am particular is communication among the colleagues and me is transparent and clear. I am a straight shooter and that is what I hope the people surrounding me also. Being Asian would not be as easy to be as transparent to the next as possible but we can always try because that would minimize grudges... unless the person already is envious that I was holding the position. Hmmmm...

All Hail to the the one on the throne....Errr.... All Hell to the one on the throne... (Better!)

Personal Reflection

2007-09-16T20:30:00.000+08:00

A long while it has been since the last time I penned my little blog and how I missed doing so. THE FIRM has completed its run on NTV7 and currently, I've been preoccupied with a new TV project which will be aired on STARWORLD, September 22nd. The post production for the 1st 3 episodes have been occupying my time as I wanted them to be as good as they can be. Of course, they have been delivered and there are still room for improvements but for a director like me, I'm never quite satisfied with my works. There will always be spaces to improve on and so forth.

I found my passion for directing back when I began working on THE FIRM. Well, the directing itch has never gone away, it laid dormant with occasional itches resurfacing when I made KILLERVATOR, CHOICE, ECHOES & TRUE. That was also due to my full time job as a lecturer. When I had my feet problem & also a supportive urge from my wife to pursue my directing career, I realized that it was high time for me to reboot my passion.

THE FIRM was an interesting project to work on as I am only co-piloting with the creator of the show, Ng Ping Ho. I enjoyed myself while I was working on the 5 episodes. Restraining myself on many occasions taught me a lesson in humility. My previous projects always had me as the main pilot and I was always in control and coming to this project, THE FIRM, I knew I had to completely 'detach' and also 'attach' myself to the project. Where Ping Ho is meticulous, I am more instinctive. So there is already a different style between the both of us but that was what made it fun to work with. There was never an ego trip because I find Ping Ho's well-mannered approach to everything very easy to work with. Since this was Ping Ho's baby, I held myself as more of an assistant for him to achieve the results that he wanted. Of course, along the way there were mistakes that I made but I learnt from them, I hope...

In THE FIRM, there was the luxury of 4 to 5 days in producing an episode of the show, the latest project that I'm doing currently, we have only one day to produce an episode so there are different challenges that my wife and I are facing but there are all worth it.

My life has changed a full 180 degrees as I run my own company now together with my wife and it is far more challenging and far more satisfying.Past, present and future collide in the stream of my mind to push, mould and form the person that I was, I am and the one that I will be. Past is my pillars of foundation, the present informs me what that is, that is and the future propels the notion of the person that what will be, will be. Que sera, que sera...

Thank you for everything that has happened and also that will happen with an abundance of strawberries and smiles.... ;D

A Whirlwind of Incidents & A Memorable Past

2007-06-23T22:19:00.000+08:00

Great to be back writing again. The past few months have been a whirlwind of incidents that happened. Finally, I have left my teaching position due to Plantar Fasciitis(something to do with my flat feet due to long hours of standing and walking)and I directed a reality TV show which would air it's 1st episode tomorrow night over on NTV7 at 9.30pm called THE FIRM. I directed the show from episode 6 onwards. Apart from that, our newly established company has been busy with the NOKIA Wireless Adventure and we are helming another reality TV show. Yep! My second round of reality show and I'm getting a hang of the format. I am grateful that I am able to keep myself these busy only sidelined by my feet problem.

This black & white photo freezes a part of history that I cherish a lot. Yep... I am on the far right of the photo and I had hair and was skinnier too.

I received a call from the college after I have graduated for a year to attend a function. I felt honored that the college remembered me for my contribution of my short film, EXIT. The function was the Eastman Kodak Company Second Century Award where Edward James Olmos (The one in the middle with the moustache; Bladerunner, Stand & Deliver, American Me, the current Battlestar Galactica TV series & many others)) was given the award for his effort in helping and supporting kids living in depressed environment.

The event was held at the Beverly Hills Hotel and in attendance was Tom Selleck, Andy Garcia(photo on the far left; The Untouchables, Jennifer 8, Ocean 11 & 13 & many more) and Robert Wise(One of my favourite director of The Sound Of Music, The Haunting, West Side Story and the editor to my favourite film, Citizen Kane) I remembered talking and discussing about his films and my fondest memory of him was he was a small man but he had a great heart and patience in sharing his experience with me. Robert Wise has since passed away but he has left us with a treasure trove of classic films to remember him by. I had the opportunity to discuss films with Andy Garcia and also Edward James Olmos and those memory will be cherished for a long time to come... unless senility hits me young! ;) Glad to be back!!

THE BRIDGE OF DOUBT

2007-04-19T14:55:00.000+08:00

Still the old fashioned I am, listening to Koji Tamaki on my discman(everything now is getting smaller and holds more songs than ever) in trying to extract an impression of an inspiration to write. I have just seen the final student project for the semester and I am glad that I have made the decision. Time to get off the comfort zone and venture into the ocean of uncertainties that can be utterly rewarding or utterly stupid... Depends on which way you want to look at it. The half full-half empty glass syndrome.

Past the bridge of doubt I have, I'm paving my own yellow brick road now. Where I am heading... Who cares? Time to throttle up my talents again. Thanking my wife, Jennifer along the way for she is the light that gave me the confidence to plunge into that leap of faith.

SURREAL JOURNEY Pt 1

2007-03-28T08:48:00.000+08:00

Overwhelming... Surreal it is... So many indescribable words to explain my feelings about my journey to India. Let's see, how and where do I start?

My arrival to New Delhi Airport was at night about 10pm. Seated at the window seat, I looked out at the parading lights of New Delhi and strangely the one recognizable icon that greeted me was not Indian at all but an American invasion, The (infamous)Golden Arches of McDonald's.

A Marbled airport, how interesting. It also has shown it's age and worn down. A cold night and finally, I found my name on a placard and the taxi driver, pudgy and excited to get my travelling bag to the car. We found ourselves in a comedy of communication. He barely speaks English and I, on the other hand only know Hindi from songs(though I could sing them but totally have no idea what they meant!), had a blast of a time trying to tell him where I am supposed to go. I thought the taxi driver would have known from the company. Mmmm... Oh! Traffic law is as close to lawless with the exception that noise pollution is at the height on the roads. Indian drivers are obsessed over their car horns... They have AIR HORNS also!!

It took a few more comedy of miscommunication before he finally got me to my hotel. The best part is I got conned 100 Rupee from him which I should not have paid because it was taken care by the organiser. The hotel was small but cosy. I HAD THE ROOM ALL TO MYSELF!!! CNN had no sound.... DARN!!! All the other 70+ channels were OK... Mmmm....

I got up early and met up with the other participants, Sherman Ong and Victric from Singapore for breakfast. The bus was 10 minutes late. As I approach the bus, there were two families of wild boars roaming past me. Fascinating!!!

The bus ride to Neemrana Fort Palace took 2 hours of hell on my back and my buttocks as the road was quite bumpy. We should be thankful that our speed limit on our highways are between 90 km/h to 110 km/h. The speed limit on the major highways in India is between 50 km/h to 90 km/h. On the way, I got to see donkeys, camels, thousands of poor people living in tents...

My Gratitude to CHOICE

2007-02-08T21:04:00.000+08:00

John Badalu SMS'd me last week requesting a DVD copy of CHOICE as he wanted my little work to be shown in India next month and he wrote that he'll try to arrange with the organizer to fly me over. The second part about flying me over, at the time I took it lightly as who would want to fly me over to talk about a short film.

Well, today looks like flying to India is slowly materializing and I'm at awe with what CHOICE has given me. Firstly, I have to thank John for arranging all this in making it possible for this upcoming trip. He was the one who requested for CHOICE to be shown at his Q Fest in Jakarta two years ago(I think) and also at Girl Pride Asia in Phuket last year.

CHOICE is considered as a departure for me in terms of stylistic and aesthetic sense. At that time, I felt I had to tell this particular story and I just made it happened. Without the participation of my actors (Naomi, Brigette, Henry and Maher) and my technical crew (Jon Yap, Chin Hor, Alfred Pang and others), I would not have gotten CHOICE made. My gratitude to the people that put up their time and patience for me to be able to create the honesty that I needed to portray in CHOICE. More importantly also, my wife, Jennifer who puts up with my temperaments to see to that that I have the space to create. CHOICE was born out of questions, hypocrisies and provocations and I thank you for taking me this far. Here's a little more about CHOICE: The Making, The Style, The Process, The Conclusion.

An Epic of Battles, Colours & Boing-boinging

2007-01-24T16:20:00.000+08:00

Where does one go for an epic of bloodletting battles, gaudy colours, egos and cleavages boing-boinging around(I mean of EPIC PROPORTION!!)? Look no further than Zhang Yi Mou's latest offering in a dish salivating film called CURSE OF THE GOLDEN FLOWER.

The image poet has outdone himself in every sense of the way in this film. The question is has he gone bonkers?

Here, I understand where Zhang Yi Mou is trying to go with the wu xia genre as he is trying to push the envelope of the genre. We know that the past few years, there have been a lot of high profile wu xia films and he wants to make a film that topples over all the other films. Where Chen Kaige failed miserably with THE PROMISE, Zhang Yi Mou succeeded to a certain degree. The closest comparison of another film to CURSE OF THE BOING-BOINGING (Yes!! The Boing-boinging of the pushed up cleavages do become a distraction that it has become a curse.) is Feng Xiaogang's THE BANQUET which I think is far superior to Zhang Yi Mou's film. The biggest mistake that Chen Kaige did was trying to anticipate and please the global audience which in turned, imploded the film. THE BANQUET, on the other hand was grounded in its aesthetics from production design to the storytelling and there was a sense that the director genuinely wanted to make a good film.

Zhang Yi Mou's film is a balance of the other two films. He has created the palace to be "heaven" in every sense of the way with gold, colours, flowers and rainbow-coloured jades that create an interesting CLING CLANGING atmosphere of sound and then he juxtaposes with the "rotting souls" who live in it. Husband poisons the wife. Wife has an affair with her stepson. Stepson is having an intimate relationship with his sister that he doesn't know. Interestingly, sex is depicted as an incestuous act in the film. The father-figure emperor who tries to unite the family but in the end, destroys it with his ruthless ego. Chow Yuen Fatt held the role of the emperor quite average as he could have lessen some of the overacting eye stares. Gong Li.. well.. Gong Li. Yes, her over sized bosoms were BOING-BOINGING also and mind you... that is extremely distracting when one is trying to watch the facial expressions for performance sake. The biggest casting flaw in the film is the popular singer Jay Chou, who I thought was not able to go on par with the veteran actors. All he could do was stare aimlessly(If that is what Zhang Yi Mou wanted him to do, then he has succeeded)like a semi alive zombie.

There is the epic battle at the end that happened in the palace courtyard which I found problematic but you have to watch it to know what I am writing about. There are also the TARZAN-like ninja assassins(Yes, they seem to be able to appear from nowhere and glide through ropes with no where to plausibly hang onto).

Where THE BANQUET was a feast for the eyes, CURSE OF THE GOLDEN FLOWERS is a lavish buffet that overwhelms all senses.

At the end, it is the philosophy of the film that I like about power corrupts and the more one gets the more self destructive it can be. Please Zhang Yi Mou, go back to your smaller films like the one that was shown early this year, that is what I call the image poet...

FIRST IMPRESSIONS

2006-12-06T09:00:00.000+08:00

First impressions are important. The subsequent impressions work on heightening that first impressions. Sometimes, first impressions can be wrong if a lot of factors that affects the mood of the day. Yesterday, my mood was good. I went to watch LOVE CONQUERS ALL with my students.

Let me first congratulate Mui again for her winnings for her film* LOVE CONQUERS ALL. Beneath this line is my brutally honest feelings about the film and this is solely my readings into the film and the nature of international film festivals.

I was intrigued by the opening of the film. Framed and shot in a long take, the seated protagonist in a moving and bumpy bus with an old Indian man by her side. The old man changes seat with her and slowly breaks down in tears. Where is Mui situating the protagonist in this scene? That she is unaffected by the world surrounding her, which would be what really happened later in the story. That is the main problem of the story.

Once she reaches her aunt's restaurant stall, we are introduced to the main supporting protagonist which is a parallel to the protagonist's existence, her young cousin. The two stories will form the yin and yang of the film. One is about a cynical look into adult relationship, the other being the naive, optimistic and fantasy-like young relationship with a boy we never met.

For a good part of the story, we see the protagonist walking through morning market, night market, making phone calls to her mother and boyfriend with this other man stalking her. From the get-go, there is something wrong with the man. His outlook gave away how this man will situate himself in the story and later, he will tell the story of a boyfriend that pimps his girlfriend and there, lies the biggest flaw of the film( It depends on how one wants to see that as an advantage or as a flaw but I see it as one big cocked-out). The rest of the story after that moulds after that story. I can see that Mui is approaching a post modernistic structure to the film, yet she subverts the very structure that she was adhering to. For instance, the man is far too obvious in his outlook where we the audience are fairly certain that he has a problem or he will cause a problem. Foretelling a story ahead of time is a danger but given to a more matured and assured director, this gimmick can be pulled off but not Mui. Not yet. Is Ah Ping the protagonist, a human being or a zombie trudging through?

Based upon my understanding, Ah Ping is the victim in the film. She is somewhat fated to live the way that she live and being used by John, the man and because of love, she trudges along like an undead for the man. Initially during the so-called courtship, Ah Ping seems to be in control and John was seen to be our "man's best friend", following her with the tongue lapping away. Once John had her in the car, the control shifted and everything changes after that. Mui got away with it because she is a woman directing a film about a woman who is a victim. What happens if the work is directed by a man?

That is where the larger problem lies. The film maybe directed by a woman but the people surrounding the making of the film are men and how does it then one make the film out? I see the film as a carbon copy of Amir Muhammad, James Lee and Ho Yu Hang. There are traces of their aesthetics everywhere in the film. The question now is, where is the voice of Mui? She may have negotiated through their aesthetics with a woman's sensitivities but nonetheless, she is essentially plagiarizing their aesthetics. If in fact, the international film festivals are skewing towards this sort of storytelling aesthetics as the dominant part of Malaysian cinema, then we are not going to be able to sustain a brighter Malaysian cinema in the future. Why? Is the ability to bore the audience to death a talent? Is the ability to plagiarize a talent?

The parallel story might be the "hope" of the story but let us see how the young girl treats her mother. She treats the mother more of an irritant and we see how much the mother cares for the daughter by trying to reach out to her, even trying to do her homework. So the "hope" of the film lies on a selfish girl who does not seem to appreciate the mother's love. Mui got away with it because she is a woman. Simply put.

Mui is an intelligent and sensitive woman. It is time for her to break away from the parochial view of telling stories, liberate herself away from the influences of the names stated above and elevate herself as a storyteller that has her own voice.

With the current state where Malaysia is hailed as one of the bright spots in the region for films, I see it more as a fad than anything else. If the international jury keep on looking for this type of works and not opening up to other modes that can be offered by other Malaysian filmmakers, I see the failing of Malaysian cinema in the international arena in two years.

*the term is a misnomer as the story was shot on miniDV but since everybody seems to be using this term as an understanding, let me succumb myself to the masses.

TEACH OR DISCUSS?

2006-11-07T10:53:00.000+08:00

A lecturer, I have been for the past 6 years. Am I still passionate in the profession that have been supporting my family and I? Am I facing an erected wall or are my methods a relic to students today?

I hate to teach!!!

I love to share and discuss!!!

Teaching is a one way stream of information going top, from the teacher down to the students. I have never really found this method of teaching effective as there is a certain condescending effect towards the students. My belief has always been when a person steps into an institution of higher learning, the person should be considered an adult and should be rightly treated like one. He/She should be responsible for their own success or failure.

Sharing my knowledge to the students has always been my modus operandi as a lecturer. I would prefer to see students as equals rather than small kids. Discussions give me a certain insights and understanding into students' lifestyles today. Try, I have to always create a two way communication between the students and I. When I share, I learn in return. That has always been a major factor and fuel for me in this profession.

Lately, I'm facing students that are close to being catatonic. Quite a big number but so few that would be generous to share their opinions in class. I want students that are able to think for themselves and defend their thoughts if they find that my ideas are in contradiction to theirs. I love to see them strive harder in challenging the current state of minds. I love to debate and argue constructively on subjects with them. They should not be afraid of me. I have never given them that sense of penalizing their marks if they go against me, in fact I love it if they challenge me. I need that stimulation to fire up that passion in sharing my knowledge.

Let us track back to the beginning, I have come to believe that everything has a cycle to life. There are semesters where I get the most productive students and there semesters where I get none at all. The passion is still there but more and more, I want to be able to produce and direct my own films. I would love to share my knowledge again when I'm in my twilight years but for now, I need to fulfill my lifelong dream to be involved in the film industry when I still have the stamina to do it. It will remain a dream for now until somebody recognizes the potentiality of my works.

To the young minds of today, to be able to challenge constructively will only bring many benefits to you. Keep yourselves informed with the affairs of the world and you will be rewarded in tokens of knowledge. You can only be truly free if you are well-informed. PEACE.....

APPRECIATION & REFLECTION

2006-10-10T12:55:00.000+08:00

Time becomes an express locomotive once you turned 21. Time accelerates further into a bullet train once you're married and have children. Lo and behold you're right smack in your mid life. Can you imagine to be 38? Another 12 years to go, you will be half a century old. Have you achieved what you have set out to conquer? And what are you conquering? Happy? Melancholic? Regrets? Money? Success?

Am I in control of my own life? My destiny? Or am I a slave and servant to time, destiny and fate? People say that I think a lot. Some would also say that a lot of my thoughts are not productive, in a sense I am not making money out of my thoughts. Does everything have to revolve around money? To most Chinese, yes. What do we really achieve after we accumulate all that wealth? We die and leave the inheritance to our children. What then? The legacy will be a cliche amongst the Chinese where usually the wealth will diminish by the 3rd generation. Is that what I really want? I'll be lying if I say that I don't have to have money to live but do I have to toil my life away in search of that wealth?

I consider myself wealthy now not in a financial sense but in my journey of life and thoughts. As I get older, I tend to appreciate life more. By appreciating life, I reflect upon my life experience and weigh on what I have done, be it good, bad, right, wrong, I have that chance to improve on what I am and who I am.

Thank you to all the people around me(My parents, my wife(Jennifer Liew), my children (Ryan Lim and Aidan Lim), my films, my mentors (Jedediah Horner, Patrick Tam, Ronnie Chan, Dr. Anuar Nor Arai and Hassan Muthalib) and my friends (Brando Lee, Sidney Tan, Ravina, Johan, Indra, Deanna Yusuf and a host of others)) that have defined the person that I am of today and tomorrow.

I appreciate everyday that I am living and my hope is to be able to share it with all the people that I know and the people that I have yet to meet and the films that I have also yet to make.

Last but not least, I am older, wiser(hopefully) and also a student always. Always a student of knowledge, philosophy and the teacher of all, TIME.

A Feast For the Eyes

2006-10-09T11:29:00.000+08:00

How does one view a film? For the pure enjoyment or is there a deeper felt that one can get from watching a film. Postponed I did on a few occasions to pull myself together to watch "The Banquet". Why? Easiest excuse was that I had been quite busy with a few things that I was juggling to put together.(One of it was that I was approached to act in an English TV pilot drama. Hence the ugly goatee that I had to grow) The other lame excuse is that I've been influenced by a few negative reviews of the film.

There was that one weekend that I wanted to go and watch it but instead I let my wife to go and watch it. Apparently, she enjoyed it.

After receiving a few requests from students whether I have seen the film, I told myself that I should give the film a chance. Incidentally, I bought the soundtrack first before I ventured into the film and I thoroughly enjoyed the music by Tan Dun which I thought was different from his previous works on CROUCHING TIGER, HIDDEN DRAGON and HERO as it was more playful and daring in its usage of piano, some jazzy elements, some Western classical rendition and the heartfelt songs.

Trepidation-filled when I entered the cinema... The prologue slowly seeps me into the film... The title sequence was quite interesting with the scorpion CGI(I was praying that it would not ended up like the miserably botched up Chen Kaige's"The Promise".)... Once it opened on the Bamboo set with the specially coordinated performance dance and the first male interpretation of the theme song, I was sold.

At awe I was at the beauty of the the entire production design of the film.(That includes costume, sets, colors and props). Relieved I was that director Feng Xiaogang restrained himself from the over usage of CGIs. The fights in the film serve as a function to punctuate the violent biddings of the powers that be. The use of slow motions seem to work for me as it creates a certain hypnotic visual poetry to the fights.

The problem that I have with the film is the way that it is structured as I thought that there should have been a little more visual development from the beginning about the relationships between the characters. That would have made the climactic moments more heartfelt. As it is, more than 3/4 of the film, the characters glide (thinly without knowing them) through the narrative with their desire for each other, their betrayal to each other without much audience involvement with the characters. Director Feng could have restrained himself in a few scenes as they created unnecessary laughters amongst audience or those scenes should have been taken out. For example, the sword dance between Zhang Zi Yi and Daniel Wu and the slow motion ripping of Zhou Xun's cloth by Daniel Wu.

So, let's get back to the initial question, how does one view a film? My viewpoint is one looks at a film through the filmmaker's intention. If the intention is met and there is a genuine feeling of artistic merit, be it storytelling or atmospheric-telling, then the director has made a successful film. A film will always be flawed to an extent that it reflects the director who in the end is a human being after all.
A filmmaker should first of all satisfy one's own self first, then only proceed to the audience. If one tries the other way around, generally the filmmaker will falter. Case in point, Chen Kaige's "The Promise" which tried too hard to cater to the global audience that the film turned out to be a hodgepodge of nothing in the end.

I like the philosophical question that is posed in "The Banquet" in the song that Daniel Wu's character and Zhou Xun's character sang. The colours, the sets, the music, which I thought all these elements came together quite well. In the end, "The Banquet" is a feast for the eyes.

The Image Poet

2006-09-22T08:41:00.000+08:00

My eyes welled up as I was watching the tenacity of this girl, waiting for the love of her life in the freezing winter. Her unconditional love to a man she bearly knows by cooking the best food, following him around, fixing up the unkempt school and finding every opportunity to talk to the man she loves (the well sequence).

How simple the film is in its effortless storytelling. Where are the villains? (The invisible grip of Chairman Mao) Where are the conflicts? (Inner conflicts) Where are the huggings and kissings of a romantic film? (Do we need them?) Once we uncover the beauty of Zhang Yi-Mou's image storytelling, you are invited into a world where it seems so far yet you are able to identify with it. He draws you in as a part of the villagers with the usage of repetitive images of the school, the small bridge and the lone tree, the old well by the school and the images of the roads. I envied him the first time I saw the film and I don't think I can approach up to his genius in the ways he tells story but he is one of the benchmarks that I look up to.

Zhang Yi-Mou, the image poet of our generation. We have had our fair share of image poets of the past, Sayajit Ray, Yasujiro Ozu and John Ford. Zhang Yi-Mou is the heir to the greats of the past.

Pride & Proud

2006-09-15T09:04:00.000+08:00

As I was searching for a parking spot, it started to drizzle. Taksu Gallery is situated in this bungalow near Dato' Keramat. Earlier, I thought I would not be able to make it as I had two meetings back to back but luckily they ended around 8pm. Now, why was I there?

My cousin, Justin had his art exhibition launch titled Justin Lim MOMENTUM SOLO 2006 at Taksu. I would not have missed it for the world. For memory sake, I remembered when he was a little boy, I would lie down on the floor with him, guiding him in sketching figures (well...mainly superheroes like Batman, Spiderman, etc...). Another one that I remembered most was when he and his family visited Los Angeles and we were in Disneyland going on this water ride, as we hit the bottom...the impact was so strong that he hit his head on the handle and I felt guilty for not being able to anticipate that... he was in a great deal of pain.

Now, while I was talking to him about his style and technique...all of the moments slowly crept into my mind. His affinity towards jazz (Miles Davis, John Coltrane,etc...) associates to the way he inspires the canvass with colors and strokes , in a way it makes me proud as he knows that I have always been a jazz lover. Justin is also a talented musician.

Congratulation Justin for last night was your night and there will be many more of such nights for you.... Continue on....

Puteri Gunung Ledang... Is it good?

2006-08-28T16:06:00.000+08:00

I missed the first run of Puteri Gunung Ledang - The Musical. I went to the boxoffice at Istana Budaya and found a long line ahead of me. Disappointed I was when I found out that the rest of the shows were soldout.

Fast forward to the last three weeks when I wanted to watch the show so badly but I was low in cash due to our kitchen renovation. I was trying to find a way to watch the show but to no avail. On the 14th, I decided to buy the tickets via credit card first. What to do!! I had wanted to buy two tickets, for my wife and I but the only day available was on that Sunday, 20th and a matinee show. To add another obstacle, there was only one seat of RM150(Which I could only afford) left. I decided to buy it anyways and let my wife decides who to go. Of course, selfishly, I want to go.

My wife was disappointed but she let me go and watch it. Thank you. Thank you. Now, I have set up the situation that I was very eager and excited to watch PGL, the question is did the show live up to the expectation?

I have to say that the show deserves whatever boxoffice receipts that it has been getting. Yes. And Yes, the show was really good. The only part I was disappointed was the ending could have a more memorable song to end the show with a great bitter note but I am nitpicking. Stephen Rahman-Hughes and Tiara Jacqueline had that right chemistry together to make it work.

During the end curtain call, I welled up a little as I stood to give the actors a standing ovation and in my mind, why did I have tears in my eyes? It was only when I got into my car that I knew why.

I have seen Phantom of The Opera, Les Miserables, Miss Saigon, Sunset Boulevard, Crazy For You and a few other musicals...... and I am proud to say that Puteri Gunung Ledang - The Musical is comparable to the ones that I have mentioned..... and it is from Malaysia. Makes me proud to be a Malaysian.

The RUT that we are in...

2006-07-31T08:50:00.000+08:00

Last night, my wife & I attended the debate forum at FINAS, thinking that it would be an interesting affair as the panelists consisted of, Dr. Anuar Nor Arai, Yasmin Ahmad, Dr. Hatta Azad Khan... boy, was I way off my marks!!! What should have been an interesting debate on "Malay films, Malaysian films... what lies ahead for the face of Malaysian Cinema?", turned into ugly personal attacks over petty issues. There lies the rut of our film industry. Oops... Did I say industry.... what industry??!!!

The night unfolded in quite a leisurely Sunday night outing with the Deputy Minister of the Ministry of Information announcing changes to RTM that had the people in the industry cheering and applauding. Of course with any governmental functions, there are always the protocols of having it officially officiated the event. YAWN!! YAWN!!

The debate started mildly with Yasmin explaining certain reasons for her making her films, Dr. Hatta Azad Khan delving a little into the Malay film history and language is not the main criteria to judge and finally... Dr. Anuar started the ball rolling with his views of Malay and Malaysian cinemas... all hell broke loose after that!!!

This one pathetic born loser from the audience went up to the microphone and started to hurl unnecessary remarks to Dr. Anuar that had nothing to do with what he had say earlier. Then one by one of the audience, went up attacking with their personal grouses and also at Yasmin for damaging the Malay pride by showing her films overseas and winning awards from international festivals. Yasmin's films merely mirrors what is happening today in our society and in comparison to the other mainstream Malay films, that is a breath of fresh air and also the truth hurts and that is where a lot of the narrow-minded people cannot SEE and LEARN!!!

The worst of all would be this person that heads the Film Department at UM who said that it cannot be denied that Malaysian films should be in Bahasa Melayu because it is in the "rukun negara" and the official religion is Islam. If that is what they are preaching and teaching at the public universities, the minorities' days are numbered. A so-called professed intellectual the person he is, I find him to be completely off his marks and should be fired or resigned himself from his post. How can he ignore the pluralistic society that we are living in. Bahasa Melayu is not practiced daily in our life! A Chinese do not speak the national language to another Chinese or even to other races. Unless the Chinese is from the Peranakan heritage where they have assimilated themselves into the Malay culture and that dates back to the glory of the Malacca empire and the arrival of Princess Hang Li Po. They speak in their own mother tongue language or English is the usual medium of delivery especially in urban areas and the guy has got to acknowledge that as a reality and films should be reflecting the reality not a propagandistic reality!!!

Dr. Anuar was very articulated in his delivery of the searching for the face of Malay films through the understanding of the geography, topography, the landscape of the mind, and importantly history. For that, he was attacked... I have to say that we will still be in this RUT if everyone involved does not acknowledge his or her own flaws and work from there to improve and make it a better days ahead.

Hope is all that I have.

SIGH.............

Sad state of Hong Kong Film Industry

2006-07-28T16:14:00.000+08:00

When will the filmmakers of Hong Kong realise that they can never compete with the Hollywood film industry! I just watched DRAGON TIGER GATE and I was largely disappointed with the film. But in comparison with the other comic adapted Hong Kong films, this movie stands a little above STORM RIDERS or A MAN CALLED HERO. Somewhere in the mess, there was a story however cliched it was.

The opening of DTG copied blatantly the opening of the Hollywood comic adapted movies which has become cliched. Can't filmmakers understand that story content is still king!! Chen Kaige(THE PROMISE), Tsui Hark(ZU) completely lost themselves in the world of computer generated visual efx that the story took a backseat and I was completely turned off. Why can't they realise that visual efx within this region cannot be compared with the ones produced in Hollywood, Europe or even the Kiwi land. Visual efx should work only as a tool, nothing more!!

INFERNAL AFFAIRS trilogy was interesting because the movie not only revolved around the story but also the characters and their dynamics. A Stephen Chow trademark remains a Stephen Chow trademark. A lot of imitators have tried to xerox his style and method but to no avail. Producers should understand and strive for individual originality than copying others.

Another thing that I was annoyed with DTG is the blatant usage of product placement that was too obvious, that it interrupts the flow of the story.

My favourite part of the movie is the martial arts choreography, which I thought was fairly well done.(Only if the filmmaker refrain from overusing computer generated visual efx.) I enjoyed the 80's referenced martial arts choreography of SPL and Donnie Yen brought a certain freshness of the movements in DTG but the efx seem to hamper the efforts that were put into the choreography.

Please filmmakers of the world, come back to the story!

JULY 4TH, A TALE OF MY YOUTH

2006-07-04T10:04:00.000+08:00

How do we treat time? Do we see time as an ally or an enemy? How does our mind cope with this ever forward momentum of time? Past is somehow but a memory but when I glimpsed back, I see a naive kid trying to conquer the world with the certain brash attitude of thinking that I am the greatest filmmaker since Orson Welles. Of course now I can laugh at my naivete.

July 4th, 1991, 15 years ago was an interesting day for me. I was living in Los Angeles over at La Fayette Park Place (They shot the Wesley Snipes-starred "White Man Can't Jump" there) near Wilshire Boulevard. (The main artery between Downtown LA to Santa Monica) I was still taking the bus every night to Columbia College - Hollywood where I was studying. A week before the eventful day, my friend, Timothy Bui passed me two tickets to attend this party over at San Fernando Valley. He regretted that he couldn't make the party as he had to drive back up north for a family gathering in San Jose. I looked at the tickets and the party was given by a person by the name of BRUCE 7. What a name!!! I asked Tim who he was and he replied that the guy is one of the most successful pornography producer. Of course being a small town boy from Sungai Petani, Kedah, once I heard "pornography producer" I was all excited to go. I called my Damansara Utama College friend, William Chan ( Certified genius... Did not break a sweat to score GPA 4.0+. Continued his studies at Cornell and later Harvard for his Masters or Phd...) who was at that time working at ORACLES in Foster City up north about the party. Once I mentioned Bruce 7, he confirmed that he would fly down.

I didn't have a car back then and when William came down, he decided to rent a car and it was a CHEVY convertible. I drove the car into the Valley.

We reached in the suburbs of San Fernando Valley where the address guided us to. The area looked very quaint and innocent, a place where families would have their children growing up. There were trees shading us from the particular hot day. Of course I would later learnt from my oracle friend that San Fernando Valley is the capital world of Porn industry. How naive I was????

The bungalow was a one storey corner lot, and it was quiet from the outside. Both of us looked at each other and wondered whether we were at the right place. We decided to try our luck by going to the front door and I knocked on the door. A familiar looking bearded man opened the door after a short while, I showed him the tickets and he said,"Welcome in to your Independence Day!!" I was still trying to place the bearded man where have I seen him before. Then he introduced himself as ED POWERS and instantly...DIRTY DEBUTANTES series popped into my head. He is the creator and producer of the series. A celebrity in the porn industry oooh..... aaahh.... My hair raised when I saw black leathery S & M objects being displayed right behind him. He guided us through the S & M objects, to the kitchen and dining area where we saw the porn stars that we have been watching on videos, (Finally getting to meet them!!) to the swimming pool area. Just as we opened the door to the pool, this two "JAKUN" boys from Malaysia (To the Americans at that time, Where is Malaysia? India?) had their jaws dropped wide open... as a petite Hispanic girl walked out of the swimming pool, wet ... COMPLETELY NAKED... walking past us. Our eyes were locked to this beautiful girl and with wide opened jaws! Later I found out that she was the next big star of the industry and her name was FELECIA.

The day started out quite interesting as there were shows at the gazebo with lesbian acts. These stars were surprisingly comfortable doing their sexual acts in front of a big audience. 20 minutes later, William and I had enough of the party. We were sicked to our stomachs and wanted out. Just before that, we had to go to the gents first. We passed through another living room where there was this couple doing it out in the open, both of us just shook our heads and smiled. At the toilet area, I saw one of my favourite porn actress at the time, FALLON and being a young naive "JAKUN" kid, I told her that I was a fan. She gave me the usual compliments by thanking me in that superficial manner and came close to my lips and kissed me. I could see William behind me with his mouth wide opened. I remembered my face turned hot. And... she left after that and we left the house and decided to go for Los Angeles' famous Chilli burger, Tommy's. Usually I would be able to gobble down a double chilli cheese burger and their famous Chilli Cheese Fries and a large Coke to accompany the food but I remembered that day I had trouble finishing the food and so was William. Just before we left the place, we saw a tall long-haired guy with a gorgeous blond just arriving to Tommy's. Andre Agassi!!

My little memory lane into the past. Fond, an experience that I would never forget, funny and Happy Independence Day America!!! Be good!!! ;)

I am glad that I'm 37 now and time is both the ally and the enemy, depending on where my state of mind is fluctuating at the particular moment.

PLEASING

2006-06-30T16:46:00.000+08:00

Hits and misses are part of the deal when you are making films. There will be films that you will be able to please a general audience and there will be the ones that do not please the audience at all or only a small consensus. Does a filmmaker need to please the audience? Yes to a certain extent but one should not make a film with the audience in mind first. You, the filmmaker should be that specific audience first and foremost.

Funny thing that happened to me is the films that I did it out of the enjoyment of making films are the ones that clicked with the audience and the one that I poured my life in making it, audience tended to be confused. Where did I go wrong? Or... where did I go right? Right or wrong cannot be summed into this scenario as everything is part of the larger journey that I have to go through.

Each project that I do, I feel that I am evolving to be a better filmmaker. Better filmmaker? I guess that is my justification but I do feel it. Others might think that my later works are getting too anti-narrative that they don't make sense anymore. I have to concur to that all my works are of narrative nature and the only difference is that I am challenging myself to step out of the conventional approach and to experiment with other modes of presentation, for example; the usage of sound as a primary source of information rather than just a supportive source.

All my works are done while I am at that particular state of mind of the period. What I am capturing is where that state of mind is at that time and by making films outwardly, I am learning inwardly of myself.

EXIT was done because I wanted to prove that I am a versatile filmmaker. KILLERVATOR was done to fulfill the earlier unfinished KILLERVATOR that I did two years prior to the one that exists today and I wanted to have fun doing it. CHOICE is to voice out my concern over identity. ECHOES is about the guilt of adultery and the loss of a child. TRUE is about melodrama of young love.

Who am I pleasing? In all fairness, both myself and the audience, I hope. (Fairness exists only in human logics. Human wants justice and fairness to things and events. In the real world, that is not applicable.) By first pleasing myself, I hope I can then please the audience. You have to look into yourself first and use that as the yardstick before you venture out.

INSPIRATION... A CONTINUATION

2006-06-23T14:30:00.000+08:00

Navigating through your brain and neurons in searching for that inspiration is utterly ridiculous. Can inspiration be forced? How I wish for me that inspiration can be compelled out of me, but sadly I don't have that special capability to conjure my inspiration out at will. It has to come by its own freewill. And there lies the problem.

To let inspiration come, all the cosmic forces have to come into a point to trigger that inspiration. Walking in a mall, reading a particular article in a newspaper, working out in the gym, driving home or riding home after work are all of the instances where the trigger happened to me. What do you do with it? Go with it until it runs into a dead end. Not all inspirations are practical. What I mean by that is there are inspirations that cannot be performed during that particular time and place. For example, I have come upon an inspiration to make a sci fi film based on whatever that is available here but without certain infrastructures in place, that inspired idea will be shelved into the KIV folder in my head. Or, you might ask the question about the update to TRUE, and the answer is that project is in a cryogenic state at the moment as I need funding to complete the rest of the production, which I need to travel to several places up north to shoot. With my current schedules and my talents' schedules clashing, I have frozen the project for the time being.

Like the idea that I'm having now, I am passionate about the subject matter and I'm going all out to make sure that I will be able to make the story into reality, a film. How?

Ah! The million dollar question. Currently I'm pursuing various avenues to get this project to take off. First of all, myself. Myself? Yep... I have got to convince myself that this project is really interesting and suitable for me at this current state of mind. Have I done that? Yep. Next, speak to people that are able to assist you in fulfilling the vision. Now.. I have done that on a preliminary level. Hopefully I can psych them up into the vision that I'm heading. Now the most important question, where is the money coming from? I'm hoping for all the cosmic forces to come together to make this project to work. Fate is the name. Pursue is the game. Patience is a virtue to let all the elements flow into its respected places.

Hope...

INSPIRATION

2006-06-15T15:08:00.000+08:00

It has been a while since I wrote the last time. Time flies as I have been preoccupied with a few things, at work and my clouded mind. Thinking too much, sometimes that's what people say to me. Without that, I consider myself dead. Without that, I won't be inspired to do much of anything.

Finally the recent job that I've gotten is complete. Thanks to my wife who saw the project through it all. During the job, my mind has been on the full throttle, thinking of my next project. It was fairly foggy in the beginning but as each day passed, it is becoming clearer and clearer. One thing about idea, once it hits you, you better write it down or else it will just fly past and through your head.

Inspired I am, again. At the moment, I'm bringing in a project that I wanted to do earlier as a documentary and making it into a narrative piece. I'm tackling a culture that is practically dead now and set the story two years after May 13, 1969. Identity is the issue that I'm touching upon now. It will be my on going exploration and investigation into my favourite subject; alienation of the physical and psychological self. Toiling I am away on the treatment of the story now. I hope that this will be an interesting journey for me. One never really knows until one completes the full circle journey. It appears to be very exciting!

I hope...

Blind Shaft

2006-05-19T14:47:00.000+08:00

BLIND SHAFT
penulis - Li Yang
Pengarah - Li Yang
Sinematografi - Yonghong Liu
Aktor - Qiang Li, Baoqiang Wang, Shuangbao Wang
Terbitan - China
Tahun 2004

Ditulis oleh - Dr. Anuar Nor Arai

Blind Shaft adalah paparan politik dan kemanusiaan dalam politik kontemporari China yang tidak adil terhadap kaum pekerja golongan bawahan. Li Yang mendedahkan keadaan ini secara langsung dan mengajak kita berkongsi "in a certain silence" terhadap penderitaan golongan ini. Walaupun keadaan yang benar yang cuba disampaikan oleh Li Yang dengan "the rightful way" terasa bahawa yang menyelinap pada keseluruhan filem ini ialah psiki takut pada kebenaran. Kebenaran seolah-olah tersembunyi kerana kebenaran dianggap terlalu kecil oleh seluruh persekitaran sistem sosial dan politik yang membalut kehidupan golongan bawahan ini. Li Yang cuba mendedah dan mengangkat konspirasi pembohongan sebagai alat yang menghalang pendedahan. Bahawa kebenaran (truth) tidak dibenarkan mengalir keluar dari bumi China yang sedang berdepan dengan cita-cita memperkukuh ekonomi di peringkat global. Bahawa kebenaran yang cuba berada dalam jiwa sosial dan politik tanah besar China ialah kebenaran untuk berdepan dengan kemiskinan dan penipuan dan pembohongan yang dilakukan di semua peringkat - di kalangan birokrat, pemodal dan penduduk - adalah untuk menyelamatkan maruah negara dengan democratic socialism pada imej New China.

Li Yang mengemukakan dilema New China dalam perubahan world view New China. Lombong arang batu di sebuah wilayah terpencil di China yang digambarkan dalam Blind Shaft adalah contoh konkrit yang menyeluruh mengenai gaya pengurusan hidup rakyat dalam sistem socialism and economic democracy yang tidak berubah dan bertambah buruk. Li Yang mengemukakan dengan berani amalan sensorship yang ketat, ugutan keras pemilik-pemilik lombong terhadap kaum buruh, pembohongan dan penipuan birokrasi kerajaan tempatan, korupsi secara terbuka, pengangguran, penafian ganti rugi nyawa (death compensation), penggajiaan buruh yang rendah, peningkatan maut dalam lombong, pembunuhan, kad pengenalan, kos pendidikan yang bertambah tinggi - adalah kisah tersembunyi yang didedahkan mengenai New China yang berada di persimpangan pembaruan. Dua dialog penting dari watak Li Yang ialah "Regulation is not without a fart", dan "China has a shortage of everything but people."

Blind Shaft membuka mata terhadap keadaan politik tanah besar China. Tayangan Blind Shaft yang disempurnakan oleh kerjasama Kaki Kino, Atma dan FINAS pada April, 5 2006 di Finas adalah terpuji kerana filem besar yang telah banyak menerima banyak anugerah antarabangsa ini sudah tentu memberi panduan kepada pembikin-pembikin filem dan pencinta filem Malaysia untuk mengenal diri dan persekitarannya dan seterusnya mengukur Wajah Kita, Filem Kita yang ada sekarang ini.

Shah Alam
18 Mei 2006

Teh Tarik with Dr. Anuar Nor Arai

2006-04-26T10:23:00.000+08:00

Two weeks ago, I had a teh tarik chat with Dr. Anuar Nor Arai and I was estatic that we got to be able to just chit chat about films. We used to do this quite often a few years back but the weight of my job and my family have restricted me quite a bit but I always try to find that little spark of opportunity to meet up with Dr.

One can be quite intimidated with Dr. Anuar, as he is as straight a shooter as one can get. He is wise in his knowledge of films and philosophy and he is rightfully opinionated in a lot of matters concerning films.

Three years ago, Dr. Anuar invited me to be involved in his Istana Budaya production, RONGGENG ROKIAH. I was initially reluctant to be involved as this was to be a major national theatre production and I had never worked on a scale this big. Dr. asked me to be the assistant director and also later played the part of Jimmy Lee in the play. Imagine, playing a part which had one of the most memorable line in the play, in front of hundreds and the "what if" crops up. What if I fumble the line? I'll be laughed at by the audience and Dr. would never want to talk to me again. Oh... The play was in Bahasa Malaysia and frankly speaking, my Bahasa was and is still very rusty. I must say that I plowed through it by taking up the challenge in working with Dr. and also my fear of having hundreds of eyes prying into me. His directing method had a vague way to it but through the many rehearsals, the actors and I slowly found our way through the written text. He brought the film noir elements to the stage which he coined Noir On Stage, with shadows, silhouettes, femme fatale and lot of people smoking including yours truly and it became one of the most successful Istana Budaya productions.

We talked about everything from SEPET, BIG DURIAN, JOHN CASSAVETES, ZHANG YI MOU to AKIRA KUROSAWA. He talked about the new generation of filmmakers being more daring and psychologically stems from their mixed parentage. I found it to be an interesting reading into the new breed of filmmakers. I will remember that Dr. once said that the Malaysian soil is not rich enough for great films to be produced yet based on the historical context as he compared Malaysia's history to China's, Europe's or Indonesia's.

A few days ago I was at Dr.'s house to collect the John Cassavetes' documentary and we had another session of dialogue. He spoke about Li Yang's Blind Shaft being very fresh and had a youthful outlook in its approach. He is working on a screenplay at the moment and also holds a position at UITM.

As for me, I'm glad to see Dr. Anuar to be busy again, doing what he loves most and hoping that he will be given the chance to direct again, whatever the medium is: film, stage or video. I'm also hoping to have many more teh tarik sessions with him.

THE INTENT AND THE INTENDED

2006-04-17T01:23:00.000+08:00

THE INTENT AND THE INTENDED - Part 1

There was a time when making a film was looked down upon or it was not thought highly of. Recently due to the digital technology, filmmaking has become one of the hottest careers to go into. It has somehow “democratize” once an expensive venture. There lies the pros and cons to the technology. Everybody can claim themselves to be a DIRECTOR now.

Making a film be it short or a feature takes a lot out of a person. All of these require stamina. To make a feature film requires so much out of you that your unwavering focus should be put to the test. Even a short film, stamina is required but on a shorter duration of time. The stamina is needed from the moment the seed is sowed on the idea of the story that one wants to make. The mental stamina of pushing oneself to get that fetal of an idea to grow into a recognizable structural form which is a screenplay is that first hurdle one has to face.

Now, you might have to face the blank page or like me, I collaborate with a writer which is usually my wife. I do write my own materials at times but I find my method takes up too much time and forever to complete. Of course, there will always be the good and the bad side of the particular process but on the good side, there is a synergy that runs deep when I have a collaborator that knows me as both of us become mirror to one another and one also pushes the other to make the story works even stronger. Arguments are always good for me as it always remind me that there is still communication between the collaborator and I, there is that honesty to stamp out my bad ideas at times. Definitely, in the beginning I will defend my ideas but I will eventually realize that my wife is right and another better idea will eventually always emerge to strengthen the bad one.

What is the story all about? What is the intent? Those questions will always linger in my head as that becomes the compass in making certain that the story and its intent do not deviate.

To be continued...

PASSION

2006-04-07T11:32:00.000+08:00

What a word! Simple yet it contains energy... P..A..S..S..I..O..N. Beautiful!

Yet to attain it, it has to come from within the person. Does it come naturally or one has to manufacture it?

A word that I have used countless times in front of my students in hopes that I’ll be able to ignite the sparks in them. Filmmaking is a brutal yet satisfying career. A career? Yes, a career. A career that needs that spark and fire burning at all times.

Many a time that the spark nearly burned out in me but it always find its way to ignite back again. My love for cinema runs too deep.

Sitting here, in order to conjure words on the blank screen, I have to dig within me to write and it is frustrating when you are at a loss of the exact word to put, but once it comes, it flows and flows.

Making films, I have to be fired up from within to want to start a project because that fire is the one that will let me see it through all the way. There will always be a million and one obstacles or reasons that will hinder or stall me from carrying on.

At a cross road I am, to continue or not and that is the question.

My Calling

2006-03-14T23:40:00.000+08:00

Rushing, I remember. I was rushing back to my rented house from KDU, the college where I was studying. I hurried in and turned on the TV which was in the living room. It was one of those Dunhill Movie Festivals but the one I was watching was different, I’ve heard of it but now I had the chance to watch it.

Mesmerized I was to the screen as the RKO STUDIO title came up... The subsequent NO TRESPASSING signboard... the camera cranes up. That was my first introduction to great black and white film and I remembered vividly that I have always love movies but Orson Welles somehow changed my life. I was yet to be introduced to film language, mise-en-scene, auteur, etc..., but the film sucked me in ways that I know that I understood what I wanted to do with my life after that. My calling.

The next semester, a visiting Drama Professor from Penn State came for a season. She would have the first major influence in my life when I took her drama module. (The one thing that I’m guilty of here is for not remembering her name, for that I apologize) Immediately, I know what I was good at. Somehow I knew what I was doing and my love for the craft slowly deepened.

The one person that is a major influence was my lecturer at Columbia-College by the name of JEDEDIAH HORNER (That name I will not forget). He was already in his 70s and tough towards the students during class. Students were not allowed to sit on the same seat in each of the classes. Mr. Horner said that one should not get comfortable in one position because that would make the person complacent. I took extra classes with him out of the college where he taught me the art of acting and directing. I owe my attention to details and discipline in filmmaking to Mr. Horner.

Orson Welles introduced me to the possibilities of cinema, the Drama Professor introduced me to the craft of acting and Mr. Jedediah Horner gave me the courage and discipline in honing my filmmaking abilities. To the three of them, my deepest gratitude. Rosebud rules.

AM I MISUNDERSTOOD?

2006-03-13T21:11:00.000+08:00

I speak bluntly sometimes. What I mean is I speak from my heart and mind and at times, people deemed that to be arrogant and self-centered. Everybody, to some degree, is arrogant and self-centered, do you agree?

The purpose I am living is to know myself (self-centered) and by doing so, I can learn to know the people and surroundings that will continually enrich my soul. I tend to speak as it is, and I can be divisive and opinionated in my ideas about films, my films, my outlook on life, music, philosophy, etc... And by that, I can be arrogant if one sees it as that. What is so wrong in having a strong personality and opinions? One gets marginalized if one does not have the same stream of consciousness as the current popular sentiments.

My love is image telling and cinema. I tend to gravitate towards Hollywood-type of filmmaking because I studied cinema in Los Angeles and lived there for a better part of my formative years, 7 years to be exact. My experience through the Los Angeles Riot of ‘91 and earthquake of ‘94 gives me a valuable insight to my living this life. My films tend to be fragmented because that is how I view the world. The characters in my films can be flamboyant, quiet, deceitful, but they are always ambiguous in their motivations. I see people in the shades of gray, don’t we all?

I have succumbed to the ultimate answer, that I am misunderstood in my attempt of image telling the way I see it as my way. Maybe I need to join the flocks but do I need to...

No thank you. I will continue to trudge ahead with the way I tell my images. At the end, I will be praised or blamed for doing it my way. I rather have that any day of the day, weeks or years... ;)

EXIT review - 6 (final)

2006-03-12T20:29:00.000+08:00

fORUM fILEM KUALA LUMPUR
The Film Forum of Kuala Lumpur

PATRICK LIM: EXIT
The Second Camera As Magnifier Of Truth

Interpretation by Dr. Anuar Nor Arai

Patrick knows that EXIT is an attempt to play drama and documentary express two fragments of materials: a) the interrogation and b) the recordings of the interrogation in camera and sound. Drama acts out the indefinite perspective of truth, and the camera records the objectivity of the indefiniteness of the reality and truth. The two materials collected in space and time – the past, the present and the future. The future comes very early after the past and the present tells us the revolving and the rotating nature of truth is always in the mind of man. The interrogator is given an exit and holds responsible for all the deductions of words, and he looses hold of his capability of words with the lady in the room.

Another interrogator enters to play another game of words – a game of time past, present and future. The cycle will go on and definite truth will never be found. Time is also alienated in the mind of man.

Alienation in EXIT is in the oral report of guilt. The lady in the room explores the potentials of language to disseminate terror within her and to claim that she was the victim of repression. She could go on telling the same story because she has that strength to transgress words. She could nourish herself by multiplying words. She is enclosed by the three walls but she could get herself free by verbalizing.

EXIT review - 5

2006-03-05T22:35:00.000+08:00

fORUM fILEM KUALA LUMPUR
The Film Forum of Kuala Lumpur

PATRICK LIM: EXIT
The Second Camera As Magnifier Of Truth

Interpretation by Dr. Anuar Nor Arai

The lady in the room is well photographed. She has that lingering dark memories of sexual harassment at a young age, and could not bridge her emotionally arid consciousness towards the interrogator. It is from her pale face that the deep gloom of her past could well justify her words. She could take on the interrogator and all angles of the story and articulates the story around her and threatens the interrogator as the guilty one.

Patrick’s approach on photography that is bare and whole projects a discoloring of emotions that holds mysterious truth to be objectively and subjectively revealed between the two. And very wordy physical with her story the interrogator bends to register in his mind the reverted truth of himself. The reversal of truth strikes right into the core of truth – that the indefiniteness of truth itself is examined. Truth pulsates in words and could change perspectives within words.

to be continued...

TRUE -5

2006-02-12T12:52:00.000+08:00

Personal Journal - 5

About 6 months ago, the storyline to TRUE began to take shape as I was working out the details of the story. I was conducting one of my classes at UCSI(University-College Sedaya International) one day and I see this girl silhouetted by the sunlight just outside my class and I had found the lead role in TRUE.

I needed an innocence, vulnerability essence to the character yet there is also the streak of stubbornness and perseverance in the character of the blind girl and instinctually, I see those qualities in that particular girl. I approached her, Rachelle Lim to be involved in TRUE. She was hesitant in the beginning as to my intention but I assured her my goal is to make a good film. Once she agreed, I told her the background of the story and the character and what I see in wanting to make TRUE. The only hurdle now, I have to find the male lead character that would help the blind girl in achieving her dream of making the film. That took another two months for me to find the him...

to be continued...

ECHOES notes - 2

2006-02-07T01:55:00.000+08:00

Director's notes -2

The Beginning

Fate works in the most mysterious and unexpected ways. My family and I had just gotten back from Vancouver and I was beginning my year by working at a new environment where the university college has recently moved to the new campus in Cyberjaya. I was contented with the trip and while still adjusting to the new place, I got a call from Tan Chui Mui one day, telling me about the meeting between Multimedia Development Corporation (MDC) and the “indies”. I agreed to attend the meeting and in attendance were Ho Yu Hang, James Lee, Woo Ming Jin, Mui, Deepak and a few others. Vernon Fernandez represented MDC in presenting the availability of funds for short projects. I was enthralled at the idea that MDC was going to fund video projects. Straight away, my head was swimming with ideas. One of it was that I have always wanted to work with Deanna Yusoff which we have been trying to get a project called DEADLINE off the ground for the past three years. This MDC funded project would give me that opportunity to collaborate with her. When I got home, I told my wife about the project and roughly, I sketched out the outline for ECHOES for her to begin writing the synopsis first. I had other ambitious plan to get the project approved. I wanted to shoot ECHOES on High Definition (HD) as a lot of the shots would be high contrast and I wanted to test the limits of HD.

to be continued...

EXIT review - 4

2006-01-31T16:43:00.000+08:00

fORUM fILEM KUALA LUMPUR
The Film Forum of Kuala Lumpur

PATRICK LIM: EXIT
The Second Camera As Magnifier Of Truth

Interpretation by Dr. Anuar Nor Arai

EXIT is the pleasure of knowing the facets of truth. Single-mindedness is simply self contention and a self desolated state of mind. Memories of murder by a basic tone of being speculated tend to proliferate its truth without alienating without self display of annoyance and hesitations. Truth is naturally unbound by words. Patrick tries to tell through the face of the lady in the room in her physical advance towards the interrogator the act of sexual violence. Patrick does not proceed to physical sexuality and thus makes to say as a statement in EXIT that sex is in the mind. Everything done is a state of mind whether it is the past or the present. The image of the chair which is not in the shot (Off-frame) when the lady advance towards the interrogator gives a sort of placement and stands as a story for itself. The table, the projector’s window, the cigarettes, and the three walls within the confinements of the small room and within reach of the camera in the camera room, act to discover the relationships of physio-space. EXIT conclusively tells that there is a new revelation in truth through word-image and visual-image.

to be continued...

TRUE - 4

2006-01-17T21:30:00.000+08:00

Personal Journal - 4

(Update: I have been shooting TRUE for the past 21/2 months now, whenever I have the time which is usually during the weekends. So far I have about 24 minutes of the opening edited and it is slowly taking shape. The two leads are very committed and they are doing a really good job so far. Brando is competent as the film lecturer and Kylie as the perky friend the male lead but her scene has to be reshot as I found out after viewing the rushes with my wife, there is no emotional weight to the scene. To be continued...)

About 6 months ago, the storyline to TRUE began to take shape as I was working out the details of the story.

to be continued...

TRUE - 3

2006-01-16T21:40:00.000+08:00

Personal Journal - 3

The other thing that I wanted to do is to tell a simple story. Many nights of discussing and arguing with my friends, Johan and Brando and my wife, Jennifer gave me a more insight to myself and my works. Johan argued that I have to make a film that people can relate to, rather than the existentialistic approach of my shorts. Brando argued that I have to work within the telemovie industry first to hone my skills before embarking into the realm of features. Arguments that are valid but I took up Johan’s challenge to simplify my storytelling approach. I feel that the telemovie industry does more damage to your ability as a filmmaker than helping. The only thing that helps is the efficiency one has to have as one has only 10 days plus extra 2 days to complete a 90 min project. My wife and I discussed many nights over my future, where I am supposed to head. I am more of a person that uses my instinct and feelings in whatever things that I do and my wife is the rational beacon that anchors me down whenever I drift afar.

to be continued...

Brando and myself at Snow Summit,
California in 1994
originally posted by patrick

EXIT review - 3

2006-01-16T15:39:00.000+08:00

fORUM fILEM KUALA LUMPUR
The Film Forum of Kuala Lumpur

PATRICK LIM: EXIT
The Second Camera As Magnifier Of Truth

Interpretation by Dr. Anuar Nor Arai

The style of Patrick in EXIT is formal. He keeps the tone of the real very close to reality. Camera seems very gradual and juxtaposition of shots keeps the characters in situations without eliminating consequential space. Intervals and duration of time are always within the regions of real time. Images are explored by the camera through rational editing, and the field of forces in oppositions between the interrogator and the interrogated are very controlled within the impulse of their emotions and movements set for them. The feeling of place and atmosphere is very soft in Patrick’s EXIT. Lights and darkness are well distributed in diffused lighting to suggest that Patrick’s search for the grey areas of the human mind between black and white, between truth and false, are within the narrative of expressing feeling and ideas. Actors are pressed to imagine within the confinements of words and actions. It is within the physical confinement of imaginations of the mind between the two in the room that demand the art of falsifying each other. Patrick gets his narrative through without superfluous display of images. Visual movement is across space from full shots to extreme close ups, and in between are the medium shots and inserts of objects especially the cigarettes in the mouth, the lighter and the cigarette packet.

to be continued...

TRUE - 2

2006-01-14T08:22:00.000+08:00

Personal Journal - 2

There was a particular story that has been percolating in my head for a while now since 2002 and that was about a blind girl directing a film. I tried to write a script about it but I ran into the block. The detail of the story swims around in my head but I could not get it into a white sheet of MICROSOFT WORD.

The Genesis of TRUE

I wrote an unfinished script two years ago called STARRY, STARRY NIGHT...based on the song, VINCENT and the story was also about a blind girl who is a singer. I had a beautiful opening but as the story proceeds, I did not have the personal connection to further the story or basically I suffered the excruciating cliché of the writer’s block. Early this year in Berlin, the thought of the blind girl came back again but in a different form. This time, she emerges as a filmmaker in my mind. I thought to myself that it was an interesting idea but I had to work out the logical progression of her journey being or becoming a filmmaker.

to be continued...

During a rehearsal with actors
originally posted by patrick

EXIT review - 2

2006-01-03T16:42:00.000+08:00

Patrick Lim: EXIT
The Second Camera As Magnifier Of Truth

Interpretation by Dr. Anuar Nor Arai

Physical movements of characters are normal with subjective suggestions to the senses and the intellect. In the opening scene, the walk in the doorway represents the point of departure of a short psychic travel of the interrogator and it rather fixes a mind-scape into the interrogation room. The camera gives a perceptual experience along with the steady-cam long take. The camera does not wander but grabs the spontaneity of the physical entity with the interrogator thinking of the lady already seen in his mind. The subject of the lady who tried to control the atmosphere of a small room set in oblivion to herself is in a reversal confrontation with the interrogator at the end of the day. The cool display of juxtapositions in visuals and words keep EXIT in an alleged forwardness of false reality unfolding in the eyes of the camera and the sound track in the next room. The camera in the room has become the third interrogator, the legal denominator, and the attitude of the director. It is a cinema of attitude and instrumental to as magnifier of truth. The first camera fails to present reality in its objectivity and seems to portray the technological bias set on the characters. Words begin to fall in every part of the mind thus creating neutral ground between the two persons in the room. Neutral ground moves along with the objective camera. A gradual intrusion of the camera (a subjective point of view) into the face of the lady in the room does not reveal truth through the perspective of the lense. And all the gestures that relate to the interrogator – the lighter and the cigarettes – become difficult in all its simplicity. Simplicity is thus a concept that has functional truth. Objects add more to subjectivity. The mind is always the keeper of truth in the shades of grey between black and white. Truth seems to grow within the visuals and the audios.

to be continued...

EXIT review - 1

2005-12-29T16:19:00.000+08:00

fORUM fILEM KUALA LUMPUR
The Film Forum of Kuala Lumpur

Patrick Lim: EXIT
The Second Camera As Magnifier Of Truth

Interpretation by Dr. Anuar Nor Arai

At the age of 22, Patrick Lim grabs very early the subject of alienation. Quite independently creative with his materials, Patrick Lim takes on a conceptual fling at expressing the motivated style of space and time and tries to recreate them in terms of the mind. It seems that the little room in EXIT has extended physical space in four-folds: the physical space of a room as a room for interrogation, the physio-mental space of the lady in the room, the physio-mental space of the interrogator, and the space of the lady with the camera and her soundman. Space and time expanded because the lady tends to recreate the memories of the murder in lengthy dialogues and provide proliferation of words on visuals. Space seems to expand within the echoes of the mind without physical extensions.

This paper was presented at the Film Forum of Kuala Lumpur jointly sponsored by the Forum Film of Kuala Lumpur and Perbadanan Kemajuan Filem Nasional, at FINAS on the 30 January 2002.The camera seems to absorb physical space on an extended mental display of words and meanings of words. It is a cross-sectional pattern of space-time illusions that accumulate the cross-passing of cue-volleys in extendable space-time relationships. No abstract patterns were sought, and very little movements were given to both the interrogator and the interrogated, but the rhythm and tempo of relationships between the two has magnified each other’s emotional pixilation on recorded pictures in the camera and sound in the nagra. The interrogator and the interrogated are grabbing at each others mind.

to be continued...

TRUE - 1

2005-12-28T00:49:00.000+08:00

Personal Journal - 1

I have finally embarked on my next project which has given me a renewed, invigorated feeling. The notion of production has always intrigued me. To do or not to do...that is the question. After I have shot ECHOES last year, it left me completely exhausted physically and mentally. I enjoyed the process of it but I hated the grueling hours that I had to endure where I worked my regular job from 8.30am to 6pm and I shot ECHOES from 7pm to 7am the next morning and continued this for 6 days. Luckily it was broken up into 3 days a week and the next week was postponed to the week after due to the unavailability of the HD camera. I cherished every second of the production because of my dedicated crew members that toiled through with me to get the project done. Kylie Chan, my art director, Clarice Wong, my co-producer, Hor Suet Ling, my production manager and Jennifer Liew, my wife, the writer of ECHOES are my saviours.

Why did it take this long for my next project? I had to find a subject that I feel that I want to invest my time and effort in. After the cold response from ECHOES, I thought I took a little time to re-examine myself to realign my love for the cinema. My trip to Berlinale early in the year gave me an opportunity to observe what others were doing and my mind went into hibernation. I wanted to go back on a smaller scale project where I would not have the financial pressure that I had with ECHOES.

to be continued...

EXIT - 8 (final)

2005-12-26T09:13:00.000+08:00

Director's note - 8 (final)

EXIT was shot in four days with a shooting ratio of 4 to 1. We had call time of 7am and ended 7pm for all the four days. Post-production took about 3 months to complete. We encountered sound problem on the first day when we were three quarter into the day, the sound operator came to inform that the air-conditioner was turned on in Sam’s booth. (Hence the inconsistency in the sound) My cameraman decided to compose the close-up shot of Ben after he reveals the murder himself. I should have had a second take on that but the cameraman did not inform me of his misdeed until I saw them during telecine.

During the post-production period, I found the person to compose the music for the film. He was a professional composer for jingles for commercials and low budget films. Again, he did it for a copy of the video tape. The sound mixing session took longer than expected as we tried to smooth out the inconsistencies and that cost me quite a bit of money.

All in all, I enjoyed the process of making EXIT and I am itching to get back into the arena again. The experience was an invaluable one. By working with professionals, it pushes your level up to theirs, as they would expect no less. Negotiating creatively and psychologically with the actors is one experience that I will hold on as I find it very challenging and fulfilling. I know of the pitfalls that I have done and that will be the benchmark where I will further improve.

ECHOES notes - 1

2005-12-25T12:33:00.000+08:00

Director's notes - 1

An Introduction
Love is a fluctuation frequency. Infidelity imprints a sense of guilt that lingers on forever in the mind of the person committing it. The loss of a child is an indescribable pain that is etched eternally into the mind and soul of a mother.

The mind is a vast area of electrical nodes that allows some memories to travel freely and effortlessly but for other more specific or at times, painful ones to hide away in a dark corner of the mind. The door could be released, unconsciously, triggered by some traumatic chances in life. Our ability as a human to travel through time in the mind is an astonishing achievement. To be in the moment yet recalling a past to connect the emotional truth in a particular scene by an actor is an incredible feat. The mind is an amazing creation that binds the humanity in us.

The question is what if GUILT entwines in a loop of time through the mind and you could not seem to escape from the clutches of your own conscience?

to be continued...

EXIT - 7

2005-12-23T08:09:00.000+08:00

Director's note - 7

Since this was a student’s project, all that were involved in the film were students except for the actors and the steadicam operator. I was fortunate enough to get a great crew that was dedicated to the production except for the art director who turned out to be the bad apple of the production.

The support for the film in US is both encouraging and frustrating. The process of putting up advertisements in the industry dailies for actors is free of charge. There are quite a lot of incentives given to film students to proceed with their projects. The steadicam operator, who gets about US2,000 daily on a film project, came into my production for a mere US50 to help me create my most favourite sequence in EXIT, which is the opening. The cameras in the college could not support the steadicam, so we had to rent a camera from the outside. The frustrating part is working around the unions. I had three actors registered with Screen Actors Guild and the hassle that we had to go through to get them in the film. We had to have insurance on them and we had to submit a contract stating that the film will be used non-commercially. All these procedures drove the budget up slightly. Was it worth it? Yes. Yes. When I talk about support, the professional actors worked for free for the project. All they ask for is videotape for their portfolio. That is what we lack in Malaysia, a strong support from all parties involved in the industry. We should be able to lend a hand to students or low budget production to get their project off the ground.

to be continued...

EXIT - 6

2005-12-20T16:08:00.000+08:00

Director's notes - 6

After Sam’s revelation of the rape, Bobby Taylor (her first boyfriend) and the process that she gets the men to her place, Ben gets aroused. Who is manipulating whom? Ben gets very uneasy as the table is turned to him. He gets more agitated as Sam describes her cutting the throat of her victims if they don’t die from the castration. The cutting of the throat parallels to the murder he committed in Vietnam. He breaks down with the murder he committed in Vietnam. After that, a bunch of military men storm in and capture Ben. We are given the information that Ben was the one that was wanted. The interrogation was used to trap him. The FBI also tricked out Sam, who earlier made a deal with the FBI. McAllister comes in later, lights his cigarette and asks for the whereabouts of Bobby Taylor’s body. Who is ultimately the invisible hand that puppeteers the puppet?

to be continued...

CHOICE - Part 4

2005-12-18T17:15:00.000+08:00

Director's notes - Part 4

Conclusion
I want CHOICE to be a mirror reflecting upon what is happening to our youth today. Although this is only small parts of our society but magnify that by ten folds and you will have an epidemic of national proportion to deal with. Our youth are supposed to be the leaders of the future but are we heading towards a brighter future?

The other thing that I want the audience to reflect upon is the notion that all of us are hypocrites to a certain extent. Our actions contradict our words at times and vice versa. We are liars if we say otherwise. There were varied responses from some who have seen CHOICE. Ones that liked it could relate to it in some way or another but there were also some that were offended by the brutal truth.

Sometimes it is easy to run from the truth and to be protected of who we really are but how many of us can come face to face with the ugliness within ourselves.

At the end, CHOICE is also about seeking that elusive love and to be accepted as who we are without being judges and not being judged.

EXIT - Part 5

2005-12-07T15:52:00.000+08:00

Director's notes - 5

Through my research, I found out that the interrogation process is a long drawn out, dry and monotonous one. I wanted to simulate that by nearly not move the camera at all.

The whole introduction of Ben putting the cigarette into his mouth, walking to the chair and looking to the mirror is to accustom the audience to where everything is. I planned the interrogation to be foreplay between Ben and Sam. The cigarette signifies the phallic symbol of over compensation on the part of the men in the film and cigarette is also the key for Ben in connecting with Sam.

Ben starts to reveal about himself in order to gain trust from Sam. Manipulation is the key word. He reveals that his private part does not function anymore due to an injury during the Vietnam War. Sam starts to converse when Ben sounded to her that she is pretty, like all men do with an agenda in mind when they are with a woman. She is aware about the camera behind the two-way mirror and compels Ben to prove to her that there is no camera there. We have reached to the midpoint of the film as Lindley and the technician have to get out of the room. Once it is revealed with multiple cuts of the light in the room being switched on, the interrogation really begins after Ben puts the tape recorder on the table. Now, did he press the record button? Another turning point is the position of the camera shifted over the 180° line in order to focus on Ben.

to be continued...

EXIT - Part 4

2005-12-02T22:20:00.001+08:00

Director's notes - 4

I had envisioned earlier on having the location to be situated at the college that I was studying in order to cut cost. There was a classroom that had a glass room. The art director and I worked out to build a wall where it housed the mirror, light and sink. The mirror was to act as a two-way mirror and Jeanne Lindley, the FBI rookie and the technician were really behind that wall.

The opening shot of the film was designed as an invitation to the story. The pullback from EXIT sign and the introduction of the hallway with the two main characters talking is the setting up of the whole process of deception in the film. We are introduced to “McAllister” which he will later appear at the end of the film. The subject matter was introduced as “Sam Dexter” in the beginning to deceive the audience in a way that the serial killer is a man. Ben King is introduced as a gum chewing; overweight (the actor gained 10lbs for the film), arrogant FBI interrogator and I contrasted it with Jeanne Lindley, an unassuming FBI rookie with a red jacket (the colour is an indication that she is the person in control at the end of the film). After Ben enters the room, I foreshadow the Military man with the EXIT sign behind him.

to be continued...

CHOICE - Part 3

2005-12-01T09:24:00.000+08:00

Director's notes - 3

The Process
We met for two Sundays at Brigetta’s place where the condo scenes were shot. I checked out and loved the location, the bathroom, which I thought was a bit small but the big mirror compensated for what I really wanted and I know the cameramen can negotiate themselves in the small area.

During the two Sundays, we discussed about characters and their history. The three of them shared their experience and history with me where I, then incorporated them in CHOICE.

Characters
I needed three of them to be completely different but in an emotional level, they need each other for support, like a bouncing ball needing a surface for it to be able to bounce off from. Naomi, to a degree becomes the initiator to the conversation and also the observer to Henry’s and Brigetta’s issues.

Naomi has a calculated coldness and an invisible but clearly vulnerable barrier that she puts up to protect herself. She is also torn between her Malay-Irish heritage and the conformity that she has to abide to.

The outspoken Brigetta appears strong-willed but is actually the opposite. She sees sexual relationships as an outlet to gratify her selfish needs of her definition of love and desire.

Henry is the catalyst of CHOICE. Being the most complicated character of all, He has issues with his religion, gender and identity. His annoyance succeeds in bringing out the hypocrisies in the other characters and also himself.

to be continued...

EXIT - Part 3

2005-11-30T15:54:00.000+08:00

Director's notes - Part 3

My first draft was really awful as I was approaching the material from a macabre manner. I called upon my friend, Marcos Soriano, who is an accomplished writer in his own right, to write EXIT for me. During our collaboration, he came about an interesting plot which involved the CIA drug operation in Vietnam that was intercepted by the US army. From there, I found the angle that I wanted to approach which is that elusive gray area.

Of course, in the beginning we did not have a definite title for the material. We called it “Crossing The Line” for a certain camera technique that I employed in the film to suggest the shift of focus. EXIT came about because of the EXIT sign that begun the film. It would also be the last image to close the film. I intended it to be the book cover. There were long debates on whether to show the acting out of the crimes from Samantha’s part but that then we would have to show Ben’s crime too. Due to the nature of our limited budget film, I decided to play them through the dialogue spoken rather than showing the criminal acts.

to be continued...

ECHOES gallery

2005-11-29T13:29:00.000+08:00

ECHOES - Part 2

2005-11-29T13:19:00.000+08:00

Excepts from the script

FADE IN CAPTION

IN THE BEGINNING... Fast cut of a LONG and NARROW CORRIDOR, deserted and silent ...THERE WAS NO EXISTENCE OF...Fast cut of another similar looking corridor, yet somehow different....TIME...A CREEPY looking SEMI-OPENED HALLWAY, the night wind is whistling.

VERY SLOW FADE OUT

FADE IN

1. INT. - STAIRCASE - LATE NIGHT

One of the lights at the corridor flickers. The upwards-staircase remains empty. A faint smoke emits from the astray standing at one corner of the staircase. The leaves from the plants in the pots swaying a little due to the night breeze. We turn a corner into the door to the office.

CUT TO:

2. INT. - OFFICE - LATE NIGHT

The office is almost dead quiet.
The only faint sound that can be heard is a slow humming of air conditioning from afar. The paintings from the walls are faces of human starring right back at you, with almost fiery eyes that one can hardly decipher at this time of the day. All lights are out except for one wing at the far end. We pass rows of cubicles at both sides but they all look almost identical under such darkness. As we move closer towards the light, we see JULIA working at her desk.

This is the first Malaysian short film shot on HD format. The entire project was funded by MDC. I sincerely thank them for making it happened for me. I had mixed reviews for the film whenever I screened it, but one thing is for sure, I am glad that I took that journey and that one step forward in my filmmaking career and I am proud of that.

CHOICE - Part 2

2005-11-29T13:09:00.000+08:00

Director's notes - Part 2

Style
Firstly, I wanted to have a documentary-like style to it. Since I am approaching it from an outline only, the dialogues between the characters were going to be improvised all the way and the style would compliment the spontaneity. To accomplish that, I decided that the best choice of style was to refer to the “dogma”. I followed a few key points but not all of the ten rules under the “DOGMA 95”and they are hand held, real locations, and existing lights from the locations.

It was essential that the cameras be liberated from the confines of pan and tilt on a tripod. They needed to be able to move freely and follow the conversation. The other source that I referred to unconsciously was John Cassavetes’ approach and recently I read up on him again and his style struck a chord in the realization of CHOICE.

I wanted the cameramen to feel whatever the characters were feeling and project their feelings into handling the cameras and hopefully, conceptually it can transcend whatever emotions across to the audience. It only worked in a few spots. Only one of them understood what I wanted to achieve with that approach. The handheld approach also gives a psychological mirror to all the characters, the instability of their minds about identity and gender.

The jump cut editing style that I employed in CHOICE reflects the dysfunctional of the characters. I refuse the fades and dissolves as not to paint pretty pictures in the subject matters that were brought out.

to be continued...

EXIT - Part 2

2005-11-28T16:19:00.000+08:00

Director's note -2

I was experimenting on shifting POVs or creating a gray area between the protagonist and antagonist. Who is the protagonist? Who is the antagonist? Is Sam a bad person? Is Ben the good guy? Is Jeanne, the FBI rookie as innocent as she looks? Those questions form the basis of the narrative structure to EXIT.

Serial killers are fascinating subjects to be explored. Of course, today we are overloaded with films and TV series dealing with serial killings but when I started exploring the idea of making EXIT, fascination of serial killers in films was in the doldrums until “The Silence of the Lambs” was released. During the writing of EXIT, I delved myself into the world of serial killers with research of the subject matter. Terrifying questions start popping in my head during the research. Are we, human beings capable of doing such things to another human being without remorse and motive? Serial killers look like any other ordinary next-door neighbour of ours. Am I prone to be one? Another interesting part of my research is that there are very few female serial killers compared to men. I decided to take the other route as in introducing a female serial killer.

to be continued...

ECHOES

2005-11-27T18:18:00.000+08:00

ECHOES 2004 20 mins

Directed by: Patrick Lim

Screenplay by: Jennifer Liew

Genre: Psychological supernatural drama

Starring: Deanna Yusoff

Synopsis

ECHOES is about memories and their illusions, reflections, its resonance, rupture of time and the question of truth.Julia works late in her office one night and she starts to see things. An encounter with her two colleagues earlier is repeated before her eyes, a mysterious woman who walks pass her without responding to her and a little girl in black dress with black balloons. What is happening to Julia?

to be continued...

CHOICE

2005-11-27T18:11:00.000+08:00

The making of CHOICE

CHOICE (April 2003) 20mins, directed by Patrick Lim

Director's note - Part 1

An Introduction

We, Malaysians as a whole are lost. Our national policy of our national language has been ever evolving. Is it Bahasa Malaysia, Bahasa Baku or Bahasa Melayu? The battle between the Government and the opposition over the true meaning of Islam has caused the government to overcompensate by regressing in its plight. Racial tensions are swept under the carpet by showing a superficial unified lot.English has been given an importance as we head into the globalized arena but are we ready to be part of the larger picture. Malaysia is in fact in a limbo state. So, where does that leave our youth?

The Beginning

That was the anchor to CHOICE but I needed to flesh out other social issues within CHOICE. Originally set to be a trilogy where I start with the middle (being CHOICE), LIFE and DEATH would compliment the social issues that we deal with.The idea of a girl torn between her wild free lifestyle and her upcoming marriage to a Malay man came to mind and I had the premise of a party among three friends as the basis. A party, with the right atmosphere and substance is a ripe place for a lot of things to happen. Immediately, I wrote an outline of CHOICE down and that was in early March 2003.For CHOICE to work, I needed to get actors who have been friends for sometime. There are many times in our own lives when reality becomes difficult to be differentiated from illusion, which is why the emotional content in CHOICE had to be truthful to its source.

to be continued...

EXIT

2005-11-27T17:30:00.000+08:00

EXIT, 1992

Directed by Patrick Lim

Director's notes - Part 1

EXIT is a short film about exploring that elusive gray area between what is right and what is wrong. My intention was to bring forth an idea that I have that is based on my observation of everyday life where a lot of the time, the line between right and wrong or what is truth or not, is blurred through a lot of other impending values and perspectives. Truth lies in the perspective of a person. Collective truth can be achieved only with a certain intervention (e.g. media). Truth to me is as elusive as the line between right and wrong.

To be continued...